Where Have You Gone, Learned Foot…

…turns out you were just too far ahead of your time.

Collecting old Kool-Aid packets is big money:

While there’s no real quantifiable way to know just how big this particular community is, the best place to pulse-check their vitality is eBay. A quick search for “Kool-Aid packet” seemed to signal the market is alive and well, returning over 250 active listings, some of which were going for triple-digit asking prices: $400 for a still- sealed case of Pink Swimmingo, $225 for a single packet of Yabba-Dabba-Doo Berry, and $195 for a single packet of one of Kool-Aid’s most beloved flavor mascots, Purplesaurus Rex, just to name a few. A search for recently completed eBay auctions showed a display of 1960s Grape packets being sold for $250 and a single packet of Rock-A-Dile Red closing out at $125. The good stuff don’t come cheap, my friends.

There has simply got to be a way to turn this into a glorious troll of obnoxious foodies.

10 thoughts on “Where Have You Gone, Learned Foot…

  1. I like how the guy hawking the stuff produces reviews of the color and flavor that remind one of little less than oinophiles praising the most popular vintages. Ugh. Drank a lot of the stuff as a kid, probably one of the reasons I’m taking Metformin today.

  2. I need a drink after reading this, so I can forget I ever read such idiocy that belongs in the Onion or Babylon Bee, not real news.

  3. I could make millions if I could figure out the next boomer obsession. The problem is they are all so random & defy common sense. You would think that they would be into gold coins and bullion — security in old age when you can’t trust your kids to watch your money for you — but nope, it’s ancient packets of unused koolaid. Maybe I should go long on coffins equipped with wifi?

  4. Holy shit a blast from the past. Now we definitely need to do a MOB party this summer or fall and get the old gang back together.

  5. Yo, Foot, maybe a photoshop of Ryan putting out Kool-Aid packets would be a good way to revive your site, like you did when the Post Office wanted to do a commemorative stamp for irritable bowel syndrome.

  6. Ah yes, the IBS commemorative stamp. Unfortunately that little work of genius was created by a highly talented photoshopper who now has a political career and would probably rather not be associated with it.

  7. Boys, please tell me you ain’t making Dirty Mushroom references. Because it took me years to get that horror out of my head.

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