Those Darned Armed Bigots
By Mitch Berg
SCENE: Mitch BERG is picking up an Amazon parcel at the drop box at a Whole Foods on Selby Avenue. As he fiddles with getting the scanner to scan the bar code on his phone, Avery LIBRELLE walks up behind him.
LIBRELLE: Merg!
BERG: Oh, shhhhhhhure enough, it’s Avery. How’s thi…
LIBRELLE: Republicans are racists!
BERG: Oh, yeah, you bet. You heard about the Republican gubernatorial candidate who chased down an unarmed black jogger – very similarly to the Ahmaud Arberry story? Chased him down and pointed a shotgun at his chest?
LIBRELLE: I had not. But sounds like a typical Rethuglicon!
BERG: Oh, you beg:
The jogger said [the candidate] pointed the shotgun at his chest; [the candidate] denies this but allows that his intent was to detain the jogger. At the time, [the candidate] was mayor of a small town in Pennsylvania.
LIBRELLE: This is truly the America that Donald Trump created.
BERG: Uh huh. (BERG takes on a snarky grin)
LIBRELLE: What?
BERG: Nothing. (He can barely cvontain his glee).
LIBRELLE: Wait. That’s the look you get when you drop what you think is the big zinger in one of these stories of yours.
BERG: Zinger? Who, me?
LIBRELLE: (Yelling at a store employee). Pouncer! He’s a pouncer!
EMPLOYEE: Er, sure, maa… (Stops, confused) Sir…uh (Looks at BERG, who merely shrugs)
BERG: I’ll be leaving now.
And SCENE
May 24th, 2022 at 7:16 am
“It’s certainly not a situation that anyone would want to be involved with, with gun violence, but I’d like to point out that I’m the only Democrat on the stage that has successfully confronted crime and gun violence,” as mayor of Braddock.”
He’s right. He committed a crime, with a gun, and successfully dodged charges.
However, the bLACK man in question has taken a side in a letter to the Philly Enquirer:
“Miyares didn’t expect Fetterman to change his account.
“Telling the truth on an incident 10 years ago could cause him more harm than good,” Miyares wrote. “Mr. Fetterman and his family have done far more good than that one bad act or action and, as such, should not be defined by it.”
He signed that letter: “Gooo Fetterman.”
That’s good enough for me. Fetterman is a lying scumbag, fit to represent reprobate degenerates.
May 24th, 2022 at 8:36 am
I remember when Fetterman was elected Mayor of Braddock. He was the darling of the free alternative press rags, looking more like security at a bar show than a typical politician. It made him “cool”, which I suppose it did to people who are politically aligned with him. It’s funny seeing him as Lt. Governor because he occasionally has to don a suit, making him look as uncomfortable as a pacifist in a military uniform.
It felt like a fluke when he was elected Lt. Gov., but it feels like imminent hell now that he’s been nominated for Senator. Our Governor, Tom Wolf, has already inflicted Dr. “Rachel” Levine on the nation; we don’t need another Pennsylvania wacko taking center stage in D.C.
May 24th, 2022 at 8:50 am
I like Fetterman. He reminds me of Jesse Ventura: capable of winning in a state even though the population is mostly against you. He comes across as authentic which is dearly missed in these elections.
May 24th, 2022 at 9:35 am
““Telling the truth on an incident 10 years ago could cause him more harm than good,” Miyares wrote. ”
He comes across as authentic…
LMMFAO! Liars Club members stick together, don’t ya, rAT?
May 24th, 2022 at 9:45 am
Chappaquiddick, Biden’s plagiarism and racist statements about Obama, waitress sandwiches, pointing a gun at unarmed black joggers, tax evasion (Geithner, Harold Washington, a lot more), Juanita Broadrick, Gennifer Flowers, is there anything a Democrat can’t get away with these days?
May 24th, 2022 at 10:34 am
One of the black senators in Georgia is accused by his wife of abuse.
Our troll: she was asking for it!
May 24th, 2022 at 1:29 pm
^ It appears Trump’s pick in Georgia — David Purdue will receive a thorough beat down from Governor Kemp.
May 24th, 2022 at 1:30 pm
^^ It looks like Trumps pick in Georgia— David Purdue is about to receive a thorough beat down from Governor Kemp….
May 24th, 2022 at 3:44 pm
Superficial analysis.
Georgia has “Open Primary” meaning Democrats can cross over to vote for the weakest Republican candidate hoping to improve the Democrat candidate’s chances in the general election. Add RINOs and opposition from the GOP establishment and it’s hard for a conservative candidate to win.
Throw in Democrats harvesting ballots and then counting them in secret because of the torrential floods . . . well, not getting my hopes up for Georgia.
But knowing the conservative candidate is being cheated out of the race proves nothing about the appeal of President Trump or the conservative movement in the big picture.
May 24th, 2022 at 4:11 pm
“David Perdue? I don’t know the guy. I might have taken a picture with him once. I take pictures with a lot of people.”
That’s what Trump will be saying on Wednesday.
May 24th, 2022 at 6:01 pm
The TDS continues, unabated.
May 24th, 2022 at 10:13 pm
Texas school shooting. Berg’s Law in effect but I’m getting my marker down early. My bet:
Troubled kid. History of mental health issues. Not lawfully in possession of the weapon. No proposed gun control law could have prevented this. Chose the school because it was a gun free zone and thus safer for the shooter. School cops timid, hiding, afraid to confront, useless.
Bet: one brand-new nickel.
May 25th, 2022 at 9:19 am
^ We also need to stop blaming mental illness or bullying for these tragedies. Our peer nations have similar rates of mentally ill people and those who suffer extensive bullying yet we still far surpass them in gun deaths per capita.
May 25th, 2022 at 9:46 am
^68% of self identified leftists have a diagnosed mental illness, rAT. If we rid ourselves of that pestilence, our country would immediately be 50% healthier and 100% happier.
Do us a favor. Shower with a toaster. Thanks.