SCENE: Mitch BERG is shoveling his sidewalk. As he’s shoveling to the east, Avery LIBRELLE, out for a walk, comes up from the west and catches BERG by surprise.
LIBRELLE: Hey, Merg!
BERG: Uh…hi, Avery. What’s…
LIBRELLE: Drumpf is appointing racist white supremacists from the Alt-Right to his cabinet!
BERG: Avery, I have a question for you. One of the reasons I support the Second Amendment is that I believe it’s possible – not “highly likely”, but possible – that despite all the safeguards built into the Federalist system, our government could one day be take over by people who actively trample the peoples’ freedom.
LIBRELLE: That’s paranoia, treason, and an ammosexual gun fondler fantasy.
BERG: Huh. But Donald Trump is now president, and you’re worried…
LIBRELLE: …that government is actively going to stifle and quash peoples’ freedom.
BERG: Gotcha. So when a Second Amendment supporter says that they’re acting in defense of liberty, they are…
LIBRELLE: Fat bald white gun fondlers who’ve watched Rambo too many times and are probably terrorists waiting to happen.
BERG: And when Hillary Clinton supporters say it about Trump, they are…
LIBRELLE: Guarding freedom against a fascist tyrant.
BERG: Gun owners…
LIBRELLE: Fat angry stupid traitors.
BERG: People attacking Trump…
LIBRELLE: The highest expression of democratic ideals.
BERG: Conservative…
LIBRELLE: Evil. Hate. Death.
BERG: “Progressive”
LIBRELLE: Love.
BERG: Naturally.
And SCENE
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