This has been a tough election season. It’s hard to make a choice, honestly. As I’ve noted in this space, I don’t much care for Donald Trump, for reasons that go back three decades.
But after thinking a long, long time, I’ve come to the realization that there really is only one valid choice for President: Hillary Rodham Clinton.
This may come as a surprise to those of you who’ve been reading my blog this past fifteen years. I’m not just a Republican – I’m a conservative.
And yet, here I am.
Why?
For The Girls: Donald Trump’s on-camera japes about women ten years ago were nauseating.
I want America’s women to learn the right lessons: that any little girl who goes to an “elite” university, marries up, and spends decades ignoring her husband’s abuses, and slandering hubby’s accusers, can make it big in this country.
And when women are victimized by sexual predators, we need to take them seriously. They are, indeed, a serious threat to your gravy train. Women need to get out there, call those tramps out for the crazies, stalkers and publicity whores they really are, and get back to business, for everyone’s best interests!
Opening Up The US! The US is not an island. We are part of a global community.
And as such, like any other business in a community, we need to separate the serious discussion from the background noise.
And nobody has more experience than Hillary at filtering the serious conversations – those backed by enough money to matter – out from the background noise.
Laws Are For Little People: Running a democracy is a big job. Big jobs have big responsibilities. The people with those responsibilities need to be able to pick and choose the laws they follow to do their work For The People.
Priorities!: Relax, shooters. Hillary’s not coming for your guns!
She’s going to appoint Supreme Court justices who will, on command, overturn Heller and McDonald, throwing control over gun laws back to the states and cities, subjecting tens of millions of Americans to having their rights sodomized by some of our most repugnant politicians.
But Hillary won’t be leading the SWAT team into your house personally, herself, so she will bear no responsibility for this, and you don’t dare hold it against her. Sexist pig.
And finally…: I realized that the only reason not to vote for her was that she was a woman, rather than a man with a mediocre record as a back-bench Senator, and a Secretary of State whose sole achievement (deposing a second-rate Libyan dictator, with the unintended consequence of creating a vacuum into which all manner of radicals have flowed) would make him a deservedly obscure figure in public life, and whose “foundation” would make Al Capone look like Fulton Sheen.
Nope. The only reason anyone could possibly oppose her is her gender. And I’m just better than that.
Of course, I hasten to remind you that after 9/11, while in the Senate, she did a lot of work helping out victims and first responders. AKA, “her job”, just like the rest of Congress.
Conclusions: This country needs someone who can both give The People the platitudes they need, while making the light rail run on time.
I think the choice is clear and obvious.
UPDATE: One more reason I’ll be voting for Hillary: if she’s President, I won’t have to write pieces like this anymore. When she engineers the reversal of Citizens United, all political criticism will be considered “in-kind political spending” and regulated by the Federal Elections Commission. So I won’t have to do it, because the professionals will take care of it!
POSTSCRIPT: If you’re a Hillary supporter, feel free to sound off.
Unless you’re a commenter who’s made a habit of leaving long, fact-challenged comments and not reading the response. I’ve given you homework; until you do it, your posts are being moderated.
I’m so relieved you posted first, Mitch. I was afraid I’d have to break the ice.
There are serious problems in America, heath care foremost among them. If Trump is elected, Democrats and Never-Trump Republicans in Congress will refuse to work with him. Gridlock won’t move this country forward. Hillary, on the other hand, has a ready-made solution, Hillary-care, which she invented in 1993 but Congress was too lily-livered to enact. Nobody is more willing to completely reorder an entire segment of the economy from the top down, regardless of the consequences, than Hillary.
Thank you, Mitch, for ‘coming out’ this way. I know it was a tough decision. I applaud your courage.
I just placed an order for a Prius.
I have to abstain this year.
While, Donald Trump is a buffoonish NY Democrat, he isn’t stupid. He correctly understood he had no shot at defeating Hillary in the Democratic primary, but he had a good chance to out-celebrity the crowed and fractured Republican race.
There is nothing in his background to suggest that once in office, Trump intends to honor any of his campaign promises (see e.g. his propensity to breach contracts with contractors). His entire raison d’etre is to be loved and revered. The easiest way to do that, as any good Republican appointed judge knows, is to “grow” in office and become a Democrat (see e.g. Kennedy and O’Connor). Congressional Republicans, who have an atavistic sense of opposing Democrats, however weakly and incompetently, would be helpless to oppose the clarion call from their Republican President to enact various Democrat favored policies in the name of “getting things done” (see e.g. the profligate spending during W.’s administration).
I make no argument that Hillary would be a good president, or even a little better than Trump. I concede she may even be worse. But I believe Trump not just bad, but utterly unfit just like Hillary. I think either candidate will be so inept as president, that it will leave a stain on their respective parties for years, if not generations to come. I would rather have Hillary soiling the name of the Democratic Party than Trump soiling the name of the Republican Party.
This is a case of winning by losing. The House will almost certainly hold, and the Senate has a pretty good chance of holding as well. I would rather take my chances with the gridlock offered by the Republican congress of the last six years than the “stewardship” of a Donald Trump. Not in my name!
Thanks, Mitch: It was going to be a tough decision. You made it easier for me. I guess I’ll just have to get used to sitting down when I pee.
Doggone it, Mitch!
In Minnesota, I still think the best alternative, is Jill Stein. To put the green party on the ballot in 2 years.
Fine, but I still refuse to vote with my vagina.
Fine, but I still refuse to vote with my vagina.
If other people felt that way, maybe we could save some money on the curtains to voting booths….
(sorry, couldn’t resist)
Let’s just reopen Alcatraz and send ’em all there. No guards, just stock the Bay with sharks liberally….
A voice of reason in a sea of madness. Well done.
The score stands at 8-1. Those who grasp the concept of sarcasm, and those who….well…..
I’ll give Girderman a pass here. I don’t recall seeing his name here before, so maybe he doesn’t know Mitch’s style that well, unless he is a long time lurker.
Sarcasm? Bill, I was looking forward to seeing how much chrome and leather Swiftee was going to put on that Prius. Don’t tell me it ain’t gonna happen! Does that mean my order for a Volt (all the pollution, none of the functionality) is money wasted?
Hey Bill C, I recognized it, but since I still think a Trump vote in Minnesota will have no effect, a Stein vote could have lasting effects on the DFL.
You have forgotten one of the most important reasons for a conservative to vote Hillary!, MBerg.
She will almost certainly have the steely-eyed Mitch McConnell and Paul Ryan to keep her big-government policies in check.
I’ve heard that — if she wins — they plan to send her an official letter, signed by nearly one third of the GOP congressional delegation*, reminding her that the constitution gives congress, and not the president, the power to declare war, raise taxes, and fund the government.
*Originally, it was thought that almost half of the GOP congressman and senators had signed the letter, but on closer examination, many of the ‘signatures’ turned out to have been variations of ‘Ha-ha’, ‘Pull my finger’, and ‘Jimmy Hoffa’.
My biggest fears on HilLIARy getting in are;
1. A hard core left Supreme Court that will not operate as the Founding Fathers intended, for generations.
2. Severe gun control. Too many of her sycophants want it.
3. Another Syria or Libya with one year of getting in. She is a war monger, not just a hawk.
4. She’s been compromised and that could cause some major shit to happen.
Finally, she drops dead and we get Tim Kaine as POTUS. I shudder at the thought.
Unfortunately, I think this thing has been wired from the start for the witch. The scariest part for me is all of the drooling true believers that are giving her a pass on her proven misdeeds.
David French was once put forward as a last-ditch alternative to Trump. He writes in National Review:
Three Things That Will Happen Immediately if Trump Wins
And the list:
1. The more extreme edges of the Left (and some on the mainstream) will immediately attribute the loss to “voter suppression” or “voter intimidation.”
. . .
2. Smarter Democrats will drop Bill and Hillary Clinton like a hot potato.
. . .
3. Conservatives will understand their place in the new pecking order — somewhere behind Ivanka’s clothing line.
All of these things would happen if Hillary lost to any of the GOP candidate contenders, not just Trump, with the possible exception of #3 if Cruz won over Hillary.
The #nevertrumpers do not realize how badly they are regarded by a large segment of conservative voters. Of all the 2016 GOP candidates, only one (Cruz) was a small government, constitutional conservative (Cruz), and he was despised by the GOP elites and the GOP donor class.
Here is a hint for the #nevertrumpers: call the other guy’s voters racist rubes, not your own voters.
Why many Americans are angry and delusional:
“Statin psychiatric effects can include irritability/aggression, anxiety or depressed mood, violent ideation, sleep problems including nightmares, and possibly suicide attempt and completion.”
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5005588/pdf/40800_2015_Article_24.pdf
I ran across this quote from a story on another topic today:
“Kim Jong-Il is claimed to have opened the course in 1987 and shot 11 hole-in-ones on his first ever attempt at golf, with a world record 38 under par.”
In this sad year of 2016, if Hillary went golfing for the first time, and emerged claiming to have shot 11 hole-in-ones with 38 under par, it would be reported by the mainstream media as the truth. Questioning her veracity would result in being treated with contempt (“where is your proof that she is lying? Hillary has been investigated dozens of times by teams of lawyers and FBI agents and SHE WAS CLEARED EVERY SINGLE TIME!!”). To disbelieve her would become a political test. You would be labeled as a sexist and an irredeemable deplorable.
It looks like Sarah Hoyt is pulling the lever for Trump, after at first refusing to consider Trump at all (He reminded her of a Euro-style populist strongman / village boss).
https://pjmedia.com/instapundit/248626/#respond
Two things are certain:
Trump is going to get his ass kicked.
Trump will be a sore loser.
On behalf of those that read your piece:
“Wait, what? Holy… click, click… hmmm… wait…. hmmmm…. huh? Oh…. ooooooh.
Yeah, okay.”
Two things are certain:
Trump is going to get his ass kicked.
Trump will be a sore loser.
Yes, this much is certain, which is why pollsters include confidence ranges in their predictions, known as “margins of error”. Honestly, Emery, you work in engineering and aren’t familiar with the concepts underlying control charts? Seriously? It’s a basic p test.
I hope that those who ARE “voting with their vagina” have at least the manners to wipe the selector nob off w/an antibacterial wipe after they vote!
Me, I’m going in wearing exam gloves when I pull that lever…. ;~‡)❱
So, Mitch, not only are you voting for HRC knowing that she will pave the way for the elimination of your Second Amendment rights, but also that she will abridge your First Amendment rights. You bought into the classic Neal Knox formula: “First, the Second; second, the First.” You’ve given up.
I hope that you feel better, now.
bb, I would not let eTASS engineer a sanitation station, never mind doing anything that has to do with calculations involving critical thinking. I know engineers, I works with engineers, and eTASS is not an engineer. He may have a diploma (or not), but that is just an asswiper.
Geez, some people are such alarmists. Hillary isn’t coming for your guns, she just wants a few modest, sensible, common sense limitations to protect the lives of women and children. Like, people shouldn’t carry assault rifles down the street. I mean, obviously, who could object to that? In fact, why do people need an assault rifle at all? If you need thirty shots to bring down a deer, you have no business being in the woods in the first place. The Pilgrims got by with a blunderbuss; if that was good enough for them, it’s good enough for you.
As for the First Amendment, well, that’s not an unlimited right. You can’t yell “Fire” in a crowded theater, for example. All Hillary wants to do is roll back the Citizens United decision in order to apply Minnesota Nice rules to political speech. You know, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Only in this case, it’s: “If you don’t have anything nice to say about Hillary in the run-up to the election, you can’t say anything at all.” See how similar they are? It’s just basic politeness, good manners, now enforceable by a prison term. Yes, it’s sad that wicked Republicans have dragged us all down to the gutter with their wanton slanders and vile calumnies, leveled against The Smartest Woman In America (TM); but what else can we do? Civility must be preserved.
Honestly, Emery, you work in engineering…
We have a guy that vacuums our office twice a week. He works in engineering too.
This was some seriously well-written satire. My compliments, sir.
Hahahahaha!
Note for David Gross; Mitch was being sarcastic. As am I, Swiftee, JPA, Joe….
How about them two certain things? Eh, Emery?