SCENE: Avery LIBRELLE is switching a regular cucumber label to an organic cuke when he sees Mitch BERG picking out a piece of ginger root. LIBRELLE walks over to BERG.
LIBRELLE: Hey, Merg!
BERG: Huh? Oh, sh…hi, Avery. What’s up?
LIBRELLE: We won a huge victory over the NRA!
MITCH: Oh yeah?
LIBRELLE: Yeah! Now, people won’t be able to kill people in schools!
MITCH: Er, Avery? Guns are already illegal on school grounds. It’s federal law. Of course, the only people it affects are people with carry permits. It’s already illegal for anyone who doesn’t have a California permit to carry a gun in public, much less on school grounds.
LIBRELLE: Right! So they can’t go nuts and shoot up schools!
MITCH: And your example of a person with a carry permit shooting up a school is…who?
LIBRELLE: Hundreds!
MITCH: Name one.
LIBRELLE: It’s settled science.
MITCH: OK. One example?
LIBRELLE: It’s settled. That means the information has been sealed. Anyway – this is a huge win.
MITCH: Because now, people who carried guns legally, but not on school grounds, and who never have caused any problems at schools much less killed anyone, are double-barred from carrying guns…
LIBRELLE: Yep!
MITCH: While the criminals continue to do as they please.
LIBRELLE: Hey! Trigger warning!
MITCH: Huh?
LIBRELLE: “Criminal” is racist!
(And SCENE).
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