Bark For Your Treat

Joe Doakes from Como Park emails:

My neighbor just renewed her Permit to Publish. She’s good to go for another five years.

You didn’t know about that? Oh yes, it turns out that Publishing a blog is not a Right protected by the Constitution, it’s a Privilege given by the government to those who qualify. Applicants must be over 21 years of age, reside in this country legally, take a class at personal expense, demonstrate proper technique before a certified evaluator, show photo ID and submit an application with payment of fees to the County, authorize release of medical data and criminal history . . . it’s fairly involved, requires planning ahead and costs a bit of money. But the permit is necessary to ensure safe spaces for readers, free of controversial opinions and micro-aggressions. It’s a common sense speech-control requirement.

Wait, did I say Publish? I meant Carry. Sorry, my bad.

Joe Doakes

It’s OK.  In another generations, everyone will grow up believing rights come from government.

4 thoughts on “Bark For Your Treat

  1. Let’s not forget that you can only use publishing equipment that would have been used by the Founding Fathers. Publishing with computers will allow someone to potentially send out too many dangerous messages at once. Maybe we should limit publishing to 6 documents at a time. Surely nobody did more than that number in the 18th century.

  2. the use of a computer should require appropriate liability insurance so the government rate payers do not have to carry the full burden of implementing the ASBO (Anti-Social Behavior Order) imposed after one of your opinions is justly adjudicated “hate speech”, “privilege violation” or especially a “satirical microaggression”.

  3. and while we’re at it shouldn’t jurors be appropriately regulated and licensed? We need to put an end to jury nullification.
    Wouldn’t we be better served by recognizing that jurors who are trained professionals subject to periodic testing and required to take yearly continuing education classes?

  4. Publishing needs to be tightly regulated. Lot of plagiarizing going on out there, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.