Shot in the Dark

The Matrix: Natural Selection Meets Text Messaging

A fifteen-year-old girl is texting while walking along a sidewalk with a friend and falls into an open manhole that workers were just about to cone off (allegedly).

She’s okay. Her parents want to sue. But who is really at fault here?

Now the important questions here are:

  1. How did both people miss an open manhole directly in their path?
  2. Did the text “Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ooof! OMG! Mother.” make it to the other party?”
  3. Would cordoning off a manhole with “Men Working” signs and orange cones have stopped an iPhone-thumbing teen any way?
  4. Why are street-level utility portals called manholes? Why not personholes?

These are questions for all mankind.

Watch the video and discuss.

In related news: Oprah Spares Two Entire Families from Falling Down a Personhole

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Johnny Roosh

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6 responses to “The Matrix: Natural Selection Meets Text Messaging”

  1. Margaret Avatar
    Margaret

    Was she texting while walking with a friend or texting with a friend while walking? If the former, she should sue the friend too. Or were they both texting?

  2. Master of None Avatar
    Master of None

    I was just in the DFW airport, riding the Skylink train between terminals. A guy walks onto the train with both hands feverishly texting on his cell. The voice comes on “Please hold on, the train is about to move”. The guy continues to text. The train starts moving. The guy keeps texting while falling flat on the floor. He didn’t take a hand off of his cell until after he hit the floor.

  3. Johnny Roosh Avatar
    Johnny Roosh

    she should sue the friend too

    Hmm. Interesting. Indeed.

  4. Terry Avatar
    Terry

    Why are street-level utility portals called manholes? Why not personholes?
    Or maybe womanholes? And if woman holes, why not . . . never mind.

  5. ak Avatar
    ak

    Mmm – fifteen, and that dumb, with a body like that?

    She’s going to make some Burger King assistant manager a fabulous underage pregnant jailbait girlfriend for a few months in the next few years!

  6. K-Rod Avatar
    K-Rod

    Why are manhole covers round?

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