Open Letter To Michelle Obama

To: Michelle Obama, FLOTUS
From: Mitch Berg, Commoner
Re: Shelves

I – 6’5″ white guy – get asked by short people between three and five times a year to help someone get something off of the top shelf at Target, Walmart, or any other grocery store.

Heretofore, I’ve always been happy to oblige.

You’ve taken the scales for my eyes. Please give me a civil rights department contact; clearly, litigation is in order.

That is all.

7 thoughts on “Open Letter To Michelle Obama

  1. Finally Merg!! You finally are learning (slowly) how to re-purpose.
    An event that happened previously (a short lady asks for help from a tall lady) with one outcome: me & Barack is ‘juss folk’…
    http://www.politico.com/blogs/burns-haberman/2012/03/michelle-obama-talks-target-and-her-dad-on-lettermans-117938.html
    … is RE-PURPOSED as: white woman see all black women as ‘the help’; me and the President are just like the gentle giant.
    Glad to see you are getting with the program. Finally.

  2. “Because she didn’t see me as the first lady, she saw me as someone who could help her.”

    It’s an interesting differentiation; First Lady vs. someone who can help.

    Imagine, being mistaken for a commoner. Second in offensiveness only to racism. The woman in question must be quite brave. Approachability has never struck me as one if the First Lady’s strong traits.

    I often approach women while I’m buying clothing and my wife isn’t with me. My colorblindness has resulted in my purchasing some rather interesting color combinations.

    I choose women as they are less likely than men to have the same affliction. My selection criteria is based on proximity – who’s closest. I’ve yet to be snubbed or reprimanded by anyone when doing this.

    I’ve occasionally been asked by passersby with requests to help; reach something high, help carry something, etc. I always feel good afterwards. Guess I’d better rethink my shopping strategies …

  3. I am a fellow tall white person evidently subjected to white racism by being asked for help reaching things at the grocery store. By non-white people no less.

    Honestly, if this is indicative of the Obamas’ level of thinking–and the past six years have done nothing to disabuse me of this notion–I’m thinking that ironically, “domestic help” IS their proper pay grade, not a racial slur. Either that, or (given his numerous illegal actions) matching orange jumpsuits.

  4. Good god I’ve been go to guy for this shit since I was in 8th grade whether I’m at a job or not. Being 6’4 it makes sense. This speaks much more to Michelle Obamas racism and privilege than anything. God forbid you help a commoner

  5. So the lesson here is: White people shouldn’t treat Black people as they would other White people, such as politely asking a tall person to reach an item off a high shelf, lest White people unintentionally give offense to Black people.

    In completely unrelated news, race relations are worse than ever after six years living under the Obama Administration. I wonder why?
    .

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