Open Letter To The Entire American Left

To: The Entire American Left
From: Mitch Berg, non-spokesman for The Entire American Right
Re: Kudos

Dear Entire American Left,

No, no, I absolutely beg of you all – please, please please…:

  • Don’t ramp up your recent re-declaration of the war on the law-abiding gun owner!  Please don’t parade an endless, well, parade of long-discredited chanting heads in front of your compliant media to throw rocks at guns and gun laws.  Don’t keep attacking “Stand Your Ground” so long that we have to wheel out the stats that show that “Stand Your Ground” has been, lefty narrative aside, a national success.  Please don’t keep doing this.  Please.
  • Indeed, whatever you do, don’t double and triple down on your push to roll back advances in civil liberties in re the law-abiding citizen’s right to bear arms.  If there’s anything that will destroy the conservative movement in this election, it’s having the Ira Glasses and Bob Garfields and Keri Millers of the world mobilized against the Second Amendment.
  • Whatever you do, I beg you, please don’t keep alienating males of all ethnic backgrounds!  That “war on women” that all men are supposedly fighting?  That’ll be electoral gold for ya!
  • And please, please, don’t keep making your “vision for America” something that makes more sense as a “Vision for France”.  Americans love that kind of thing.

Please, lefties.  Don’t keep doing any of that.  It’ll just destroy us this November.

That is all.

17 thoughts on “Open Letter To The Entire American Left

  1. And please, please, whatever you do, don’t throw me into that bramble patch (or is it too soon to quote that story?).

  2. Also please don’t continue to say voter ID is racist. We will surely lose on that issue if you continue to paint use us as knuckle-draging racists who are trying to suppress the voter turnout of minorities and young and old people

  3. As the Lord of the Underworld, PofD, aren’t you a card-carrying knuckle-dragging racist?

  4. I get a free pass because how can you be racist if you hate everyone yet are willing to help anyone if they pay you? I believe that is called soulless, no problem though we have so many souls over here we don’t even know what to do. If anyone remembers an old Simpsons Halloween episode that whole selling your soul for a dount/F1 racing car is real. They totally got that from us.

  5. And please don’t stop using Debbie Wasserman Schulz as your spokeschanter. Her image on the screen gives men everywhere thoughts of a nasty divorce from a nagging first wife.

  6. <Peni'sDog} The demographic for gun nuts, as reflected in the NRA membership, is old and white, flabby and crabby. My impression of a lot of these gun owners is that they are compensating for their lack of physical fitness as well as reflecting a more commonly right wing unreasonable fear and suspicion of the world. These individuals don’t strike me as the optimum candidates to be entrusted with lethal weapons, and we have far too many incidents which suggests this is a correct assessment. There may from time to time be variation in one or more of the characteristics, but overall, it seems a great rule of thumb to identify people we should not be allowing to arm, least of all permitting them to be armed in public, because they are a danger to themselves and others.
    In that context, any and all ‘Shoot First’ laws should be repealed, effective immediately. We do not need these extra homicides or injuries from gun nuts shooting people.
    {/PenisBlog> – Wednesday, April 25, 2012

    Obviously, mberg, you are compensating for somthing and teh NRA membership is eeevil and YOU are old and white, flabby and crabby!
    Public enemy #1.
    NO GUNS FOR YOU!!!

  7. ew, even the Tr0lls I have in the basement wouldn’t touch that woman with a 10 foot poll. On the plus side she makes Nancy Pelosi look “attractive” in comparison. People have come to me wishing for us to make sure she has an “unfortunate accident”. We don’t do physical harm at the DDE but we did pass it along to SEIU and OWS reps.

  8. What no penis compensation? The left have moved away from that meme. Also what part of the 2nd amendment doesn’t DoGpenis understand? That’s like saying the first amendment shouldn’t apply to Nazi’s and communists, their views are just so wrong they shouldn’t be able to say them. Then again Nancy Pelosi is trying to do something like that so I’d better be careful what I say.

  9. Also, how much has murder went up in states where the “shoot first” which is aka stand your ground laws have been passed? Didn’t it go down?

  10. As evidenced by P-Dog’s rant, we need not defend ourselves within our own castle with guns and bullets. Better to use BOLD TYPE. It makes the same impact as a bullet, without all the carnage. It may not stop the aggressor but, if will tell the homicide team exactly how violated you felt.

  11. It would be ironic if someone came into Pens or DoGpenis’ house armed and robbed them I have a feeling their attitude might change. Better to explain why you killed someone than have a funeral

  12. Also it can’t be homicide if someone breaks into your house. Homicide means you are actively trying to kill someone, not defend your turf, care to explain DGEEEE?

  13. I told you it was all about race with these people, didn’t I?
    Older white males are now an officially disapproved of group by liberals.

  14. “old and white, flabby and crabby”

    Otherwise known as responsible gun owners. I should introduce her to some of the people that I have run into at the gun range in Lakeville, then dare her to challenge their physical fitness. Three of the smokin’ hot women that I have meant run marathons. Maybe they can challenge the puppy mill operator to a foot race.

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