Hammers Get The Nod

By Mitch Berg

Frank Fleming asks “who’d be a better president – Obama or a sack of hammers?”, and reaches a conclusion…

Overall

Taking all these areas into consideration, it’s pretty easy to see that a sack of hammers would be a much better president than Obama. This isn’t to say that Obama is dumber than a sack of hammers — a ridiculous assertion — it’s just to say that he’s much worse at being a president than one.

…that would surprise nobody that is really paying attention.

Of course, this is all hypothetical, as you’ll never find a sack of hammers with the fire in the belly necessary to both run for president and win. Perhaps that’s a problem in our system of democracy that someone like a sack of hammers, who would be an above average to great president, could never be elected.

Check out the reasoning that led to the conclusion.

12 Responses to “Hammers Get The Nod”

  1. Terry Says:

    Jack Cashill critiques one of the few examples we have of Obama’s writing when he was president of Harvard Law Review:
    http://www.americanthinker.com/2011/08/early_obama_letter_confirms_inability_to_write.html
    Bad grammar and confused syntax. Lawyers make their living by writing.
    Obama isn’t an evil genius, intent on turning this country into a socialist nation. He just ain’t that bright.
    Try to figure out what tense Obama is using in this passage:

    I would therefore agree with the suggestion that in the future, our concern in this area is most appropriately directed at any employer who would even insinuate that someone with Mr. Chen’s extraordinary record of academic success might be somehow unqualified for work in a corporate law firm, or that such success might be somehow undeserved.

    If you think Cashill is misrepresenting Obama’s written words, the above paragraph can be found on the HLR’s website: http://www.hlrecord.org/2.4475/record-retrospective-obama-on-affirmative-action-1.577511?pagereq=2

  2. golfdoc50 Says:

    People in powerful positions would do well to employ a sack of hammers as an advisor when they are tempted to make decisions that will have far reaching effects and unintended consequences. That is not to claim inaction is always the best course, but as a mentor of mine once put it: “Once the worms get out of the can, it’s hard to get them back in.”

  3. Kermit Says:

    As I recall, the GOP ran Sack of Hammers against Obama. He lost.

  4. Terry Says:

    I thought sack-of-hammers was Obama’s running mate.

  5. nerdbert Says:

    No, dumber than a hammer is Obama’s VP. It’s his life insurance.

    I’ve said in the past that my dog would be a better President than Obama since he’d spend four years curled up on the couch sleeping. Seems like Frank agrees.

  6. Kermit Says:

    Obama’s running mate was Sack of Rocks. With hair plugs. Cha cha cha Chia!

  7. Terry Says:

    Nerdbert, you should check this out:
    http://www.hlrecord.org/2.4475/record-retrospective-obama-on-affirmative-action-1.577511?pagereq=1
    An entire letter Obama wrote to Harvard Law Review Record back in 1990, while he was President of HLR.
    It’s a train wreck, written as though it was meant to sound like a high-falutin’ lawyer should sound with unnecessary adjectives, odd phrasing, and some uncertainty, when the clauses get complicated, whether a word is used in its noun sense or in its verb sense.
    Plus, bonus! An admission that his academic success was based not on the content of his character, but the color of his skin:

    I must say, however, that as someone who has undoubtedly benefited from affirmative action programs during my academic career, and as someone who may have benefited from the Law Review’s affirmative action policy when I was selected to join the Review last year, I have not personally felt stigmatized either within the broader law school community or as a staff member of the Review.

  8. Chuck Says:

    If the sack of hammers comes from Mexico, it could get elected. I mean, think about it. The sack of hammers would be the first Mexican-American President. Or was BIll Clintonista the first Mexican-American President?

  9. Kermit Says:

    Because above and beyond all considerations, it is all about Obama. Everything is about Obama. Do not question the Center of the Universe.

  10. Kermit Says:

    No, Clinton was the first black President. Jebus, how many times do we have to rewrite the history books?

  11. Chuck Says:

    Terry, if Obama didn’t have a dark hue to his skin, Hillary Clinton would be president right now. You know, if she would have ditched Bill, I could actually live with her being president. I just couldn’t stand smug Bill on TV almost every day.

  12. Troy Says:

    The big advantage the Bag Of Hammers have is that they don’t subscribe to the “Facepalmian” economic theory:

    http://michellemalkin.com/2011/09/01/robert-reich-government-must-spend-more-to-get-out-of-debt/

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