Back when I was a kid, Erica Jong was the it writer.  Her books were the ones that my friends’ moms kept carefully tucked under all the other books on their nightstands, out of view.  We – the 12 and 13 year old versions of the neighborhood kids – snuck furtive glances at the oh-so-risque covers, got uneasy about the chances of getting caught, carefully put the books back where they belonged, and snuck carefully away.

Jong is still alive, but – if this post from Monday’s Huffpo is any indication – should have stuck with writing romance novels for women who’d just discovered the pill.

Social commentary would seem to be way beyond her.

I am so tired of pink men bombing brown children and rationalizing it as fighting terrorism.

And I, Erica, am so tired of purple(faced) women – women whose faces have turned bright purple from constant unrestrained ire – reducing complex questions to facile “racisms”.  D’ya suppose the Huffpo will take note?

I am so tired of pink men telling women (of all colors) what to do with their wombs–which connect with their brains–in case you forgot.

Nope, Erica – unlike you, I am a genuine feminist.  And, as it happens, a Christian humanist; I believe that when that egg gets conceived, the mom and dad have kicked off something that transcends either one of their own lives.  To reduce it to a matter of female anatomical politics is…well, yet another thing I’m tired of purple(faced) women doing.  And doing.  And doing.  

  I am so tired of pink men having wives who stand behind them and nod sagely on television.

I am so tired of “pro-choice” purple(faced) women who have nothing but contempt for choices not their own.

I am so tired of pink men expecting that someone–a brown, black, yellow or white woman–will trail behind them changing light bulbs, taking out garbage, washing laundry, keeping food in the house, taking care of kids of all ages, of parents of all ages.

And I’m sick to death of purple(faced) upper-middle-class over-famed dingbats and their sneering paternalistic preconceptions, bigotries and prejudices.

I am so tired of pink men whose wives double or triple the family income thinking they can spend it without doing a damn thing at home.

I’m a little peeved about purple(faced) women who ignore Warren Farrell’s research – that shows that between working more on the job and sharing more responsibility at home, men actually work more per week than women do.  I’d like those purple(faced) women to keep their purplefaced opinions out in Scarsdale and Beverly Hills, where they belong.

 I am so tired of pink men spouting nonsense on TV. I am so tired of pink men arguing, blathering, bloviating, predicting the future–usually wrongly–and telling women to shut up.

And I’m dog-tired of purple(faced) women who think that the marketplace of ideas is a zero-sum game, where a “pink” man speaking necessarily shuts up a woman. 

 I am so sick of hearing that another pink man has dropped his children out a window, off a bridge or killed his pregnant wife or killed his unpregnant wife because he was infatuated with another pregnant woman.

I’m sick of it too!  And just as sick when pink women, or women of any other color.  I’m just as sick of purple(faced) women yammer ignorantly about “pink” mens’ infatuations, and ignore the fact that women (especially “pink”) ones, are the ones that initiate the vast majority of divorces, with all their attendant social cost to our kids – pink, red, brown, black and none-of-the-above. 

I am so sick of pink men appointing their mediocre cronies to judgeships, to political advisors, to cushy jobs, to columns in the paper, to multimillion-dollar posts as CEOS or actors…

…and I’m sick of purple(faced) women barbering and phumphering about “pink male” mediocrity on the one hand, and voting for the likes of Barbara Boxer and Hillary Clinton on the other. 

I am so tired of pink men.

And for this pale pink fella, it’s very mutual.

Especially when referring to purple(faced) women who, were they not arrogant, overrated skags whose fifteen minutes expired thirty years ago, would have remarks like the below condemned as the bigoted, ill-informed, patronizing tripe it is:

So let’s just remember our mothers–who bore us, protected us against our fathers and grandfathers 

Ms. Jong:  if your many face-lifts will allow sound to past through your ears, listen up: Rot.

In.

Hell.

“Protected us from our fathers?”

There is no form of scum lower than you, you dessicated old plastic-surgery-lab-project slag. 

I am not stupid.

No.  You’re something much, much worse. 

 I know all generalizations are false. I know there are bad mothers, bad women, bad sisters, bad aunts, and bad females of every stripe. But I have seen enough men in high office to last a lifetime. Let’s give women a chance!

Ms. Jong; if you’re an example of what women in power are like – and I’d like to think you are not – you’ve set your cause back a few decades.

This entry was posted by by Mitch Berg on Tuesday, January 15th, 2008 at 5:31 am and is filed under Men and Women, Stupid. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.