SCENE 1: It is Constantinople, 1453. The Ottoman forces under SULEIMAN THE GREAT have breached the inner wall of defenses, on their way toward changing the city’s name to Istanbul. SULEIMAN and GENERAL KARAKÜL are standing in the breach, as troops stream past, on their way to loot, rape and pillage.
KARAKÜL: “Go forth and seize what you will, and burn the rest, for you have earned it!
SULEIMAN: (Looking at a sign, in Greek, just inside the wall). Uh, just a moment. The sign says “No raping, looting, pillaging or burning”.
KARAKÜL: Ooops. Good catch, your excellency. (Yelling to troops) Check that. No looting, raping or pillaging!
SCENE 2: Nürnberg, Germany, 1934. The leaders of the recently-empaneled German “Emergency Cabinet” led by Adolf HITLER, are walking from a meeting to a small vegetarian cafe for lunch, discussing their plans now that they’ve achieved complete control of Germany.
HITLER: So, we’ve agreed. The campaign for Lebensraum and the final solution to the “Jewish Problem” must proceed in parallel…”
RUDOLPH HESS: Uh, Mein Führer, before we go too far on that, check that out.
(HESS points at a multicolored sign on the wall next to the cafe.
HITLER: “In this haus, we believe that science is real, that nobody is illegal, that Jews are Human…”
MARTIN BORMAN: D’oh.
HITLER: That changes everything. Maybe we should just work something about with the Poles about Danzig…
SCENE 3: Minneapolis. It’s 1AM on a Saturday morning. Inge SVENSSON and Guiseppe MORELLI, two young hoodlums with arms laden with bottles of cheap vodka and drug syringes, are walking onto the Green Line platform at Stadium Village.
MORELLI: Damn. I need a fix.
SVENSSON: Me too. And I feel like groping some chick.
MORELLI: Groping, my a**. I need to get some.
(A Green Line train with few passengers pulls up to the stop)
SVENSSON: I like how you think my good man. But first, I gotta take a dump.
MORELLI: Don’t be a pig and do it here. Do it on the train. And hurry – my back teeth are floating. Also, I gotta get high.
SVENSSON: Oh, s**t. Wait. Read this:
(Both men scrutinize the sign).
MORELLI: No pooping, peeing, drinking or drug use?
SVENSSON: Dammit. Now we gotta find a restaurant.
MORELLI: The Metro cares about that stuff now? Who knew?
And SCENE
Question #1: By who?
Question #2: Will Metro Transit really throw “the unsheltered” out into the cold and snow?
Question #3: What if, for no fault of their own, they are addicted to drugs and violence? Can we really be so cruel?
I think you mean 1453 in Constantinople – not that it changes your well-made point.
I think you mean 1453 in Constantinople
Doh. Correct.
I had the Great Schism on my mind.
^ I was going to question that Inge used as a boy’s name as well, but I was pedantic enough to check. In Denmark, it is, as far as I know, exclusively a girl’s name but it seems that in Sweden and Norway it is indeed (mostly) a boy’s name. Btw, those Svenssons have always been troublemakers.
Have you seen the story about how “They” are going to try to do a repeat Chauvin on a MN State Highway Patrol Trooper? $5 Pool on when the first business in Minneapolis burns?
How many Precincts you think they can burn this time?
Norway it is indeed (mostly) a boy’s name
My third cousin in rural Norway – a guy – is Inge (short for Ingjald).
One might note that it’s actually an improvement that somebody in the state is saying that this sort of thing is unacceptable, even if they don’t quite mean it. It’s not what you’ll see in functional blue class neighborhoods yet–where older residents will pull a young punk aside and tell him words to the effect of “Knock it off, we’ve got a society to preserve here!”–but it’s better than what we’ve had.
I’m betting they won’t follow through, alas, but it’s a start.