THEM: “You are a Christian. You believe in an invisible man that controls everyone and everything. A flying spaghetti monster. I, on the other hand, am a creature of pure reason! I believe in an evidence-based life!”
ME: “I *am* a Christian.”
“And you believe that a fetus isn’t human until it is born, that there are hundreds of genders, that the remedy to climate change is to hand the keys of the world’s economy over to the same people that can’t manage the Drivers License office, that men can menstruate, that the “elite” media doesn’t serve an institutional narrative, that there’s an impending wave of “right wing domestic terror” coming any day now but “Anti”-Fa is just a bunch of idealistic kids.
“You believe that Western civilization for all its faults has no more merit than Iranian or Chinese or Nigerian civilization, that Bjørn Lomborg and John Lott are hacks but Greta Thunberg and David Hogg are voices of reason, that gun control saves lives and that the law-abiding gun owner is a massacre waiting to happen, hat socialism in large, complex, heterogenous societies isn’t a vortex that leads to poverty and massive wealth inequity and death, that open borders lead to freedom, prosperity and justice, that American democracy is defined by and inextricable from slavery.
“You think that our election system is simultaneously run by the Russians but not at all no way no how chock full of domestic election fraud, that all Christians are young-earth Creationists and that faith is the opposite of reason – which would mean that Ben Carson knows less about science than some pinhead reporter at CNN.
“Tell me again about that evidence-based life?”