Shot in the Dark

Gerbils For Freedom

My granddaughter is on vacation this week in Wisconsin Dells, so Grandma and I are gerbil-sitting. I remember gerbils from the olden days, they were just rats that lived in a big cage and made noise all night. Nowadays, they have a space-age plastic entertainment complex, with a menu of carefully selected natural foods and colorful blocks of wood, scientifically selected from the best species to promote rodent tooth health and avoid chemicals that may be hazardous.
That stupid rat lives better than I do, and vastly better than people in Venezuela, not to mention the free-range rats living in my attic. When did pets become bling?
I suppose I shouldn’t complain. At least she hasn’t declared it to be her emotional support animal, so I can prohibit her from bringing it in the car.
Joe Doakes

When you think about it? Gerbils have gotta be thankful for the blessings of the free market. Not only do they live better than “citizens” (subjects) in Venezuela, but in fact they’re pretty much food down there these days.


by

Tags:

Comments

3 responses to “Gerbils For Freedom”

  1. Greg Avatar
    Greg

    Sadly, the more spoiled the gerbils become, the more aggrieved they feel.

  2. gl whisler Avatar
    gl whisler

    To plagiarize something I read long ago: “Gerbils’ place in the environmental niche is to get small children used to the idea of death without too much emotional trauma.”

  3. Swiftee Pinochet Avatar
    Swiftee Pinochet

    I nominate the noble Gerbil for the Mayor Buttgag for President campaign mascot.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.