This just in from an alternate universe in which Barack Obama was President of the United States on June 6, 1944; this is his proclamation announcing the invasion continued surveillance and aggressive patrolling actions in Normandy.

Soldiers, Sailors and Airpeople of the Allied Relief Force!

You are about to embark upon the Great Shout-Out At Hitler, toward which we have striven these many months. The eyes of the world – even those very, very many parts of the world whom we have aggrieved in the past –  are upon you. The hopes and prayers of security-loving people everywhere march, walk, and roll in their wheelchairs alongside you.
In company with our brave Allies and brothers-and-sisters-in-arms on
other Fronts, you will bring about the prevention of the German human-caused-disaster machine from conquering any more territory until further communityorganization can take full effect, as well as, the bringing to justice in a court of law of the Nazi tyrants, who were the responsibility of the previous administration anyway, over the oppressed and, it needs to be said, at times oppressive peoples of Europe, and security for ourselves in a world with adequate social spending.

Your task will not be an easy one. Your opponents are is well trained,
well equipped and man-made-disaster hardened. He will fight savagely.
They are, indeed, haters.

But this is the year 1944! Much has happened since the Nazi triumphs of 1940-41. The United Nations have inflicted upon the Germans great setbacks in negotiations to preclude further man-made disasters. Our air offensive has seriously reduced their strength in the air and their capacity  to wage war on the ground, while erroneous collateral damage is being paid for out of an international trust fund. Our Home Fronts have given us an overwhelming superiority in money and political will, and placed at our disposal great reserves of trained lawyers and organizers, as well as all of you alternate-resolution specialists. The tide has turned! The free men and women of the world are marching together to send a message to Mister Hitler; stop advancing!

I have full confidence in your courage and devotion to duty and skill in dealing with this epic man-made disaster. We will accept nothing less than sending a very serious message!

Good luck! And let us beseech the blessing of Me upon this great
and noble undertaking.

                          SIGNED: Barack H. Obama
                          President
                          United Communities of America

This entry was posted by by Mitch Berg on Thursday, December 3rd, 2009 at 6:00 am and is filed under President Obama. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.