Looking Ahead

SCENE:  One day in 2010.  President Obama speaking to a crowd at the Ground Zero memorial at Hiroshima:

(OBAMA steps to the podium)

OBAMA: Uh, welcome, ladies and gentleman.  Before I get started, I’d like to give a quick shout-out to my good friend and world-wide hero Al Gore for the efforts he’s making to, uh, save the world.  He’s sparing no effort to convince people, including some of the efforts that, uh, your people, uh, Emperor Akihito, perfected during your father’s time. (Akihito shifts nervously on his feet).  I think the world owes him more than just the Nobel Peace Prize.  I’d suggest perhaps they make him pope.  (Robert Gibbs starts clapping; stops after a few awkward seconds).  He’s also reaching across the aisle to call, uh, Sarah Palin “gung ho“. Anyway. Just a big shout out. 

Crowd claps nervously.

OBAMA: OK.  Now, Hiroshima.  I’d like to start by thanking my lord and liege, Emperor Akihito, for inviting me here. 

OBAMA turns, bows deeply.  Stays bowed long enough to tie shoes with tongue.

AKIHITO Nods.

OBAMA (remains bowed)

AKIHITO. (clears throat)

OBAMA (remains bowed)

AKIHITO: Er, mister president?  Carry on.

OBAMA: Thank you, sir.  At any rate, I’d like to express my offical sorrow and apology for the mistakes on the part of my predecessors that led to the inhuman attack on this city, and for the deaths of all the women and chidren who were  for the deaths of all the women and chidren who werefor the deaths of all the women and chidren who werefor the deaths of all the women and chidren who werefor the deaths of all the women and chidren who werefor the deaths of all the women and chidren who were…

TECHNICIAN: (kicks teleprompter)

OBAMA: …hope and change. Thank you.

(Japanese string band plays “Hail To The Chief”)

24 thoughts on “Looking Ahead

  1. Uh, Obama is so overexposed, at this point, that I can read that with, uh, a reasonable imitation, of his clipped and precise inflection.

  2. “At least we won *that* war.”

    Yeah, not that the left didn’t do it’s damnedest to make sure that didn’t happen.

    Curious.

    Does AssClown have Ethyl and Julius Rosenberg’s portrait in his wallet?

  3. Truman was a loyal Democrat. He actually served in a war. Backed universal health insurance and signed the Marshall Plan, spending buttloads of money in Europe. You inbred, banjo-picking wingnuts would call him a Nazi.

  4. Backed universal health insurance

    In a form not dissimilar to the Medicare that Pelosi and company are trying to shred.

    signed the Marshall Plan

    Marshall was a conservative Republican.

    Ergo, the Marshall plan, which spent “buttloads of money in Europe”, may have been the last governmetn spending program to actually work.

    You inbred, banjo-picking wingnuts

    I would KILL to find a good banjo for cheap right now. It’s a fun one to play; kinda turns a lot of guitar and mandolin technique on its head. I could use that.

  5. 10:00 am and AssClown is already high on colon fumes.

    Today’s Democrat party would be photoshopping a Hitlerstach on Truman and harassing his children in school.

    The only thing that would keep the party of scrubs from nominating Ethyl Rosenberg for President in 2012 is the small fact she’s worm food…come to think of it, that might not be enough to stop them,

  6. Inbred? Hmm. I’m beginning to see Swiftee’s point regarding Clownie.
    You are mean-spirited and divisive, Clownie. In other words, a good liberal.

  7. that might not be enough to stop them,

    They’re both registered to vote in Chicago. And, I think, Saint Paul.

  8. “They’re both registered to vote in Chicago. And, I think, Saint Paul.”

    And Minneapolis? That would explain why the voter turnout was so low.

  9. And Minneapolis?

    Could be. We’ll only know for sure in a few months when they get done counting the 13th choice votes.

  10. Accusing someone of projection as a defense mechanism is the community-school equivalent of the “I’m rubber and you’re glue” retort.

  11. AB,

    That’s true. And saying “accusing someone of projection as a defense mechanism is the community-school equivalent of the “I’m rubber and you’re glue”” is the sophomore-level logic class equivalent of the “Yo Momma” counterstroke.

    Which is not to say the vast majority of accusations of projection aren’t mistaken; I happen to know that as much as Clown admires Bela Fleck and the Flecktones, he is an atrocious banjo player.

  12. How am I supposed to mock y’all if you don’t allow images in your comments??

    Oh, goodie, I could become Democrat Underground. Whooie.

    By the way, which of those “images” implies abasement before a monarch? I mean, if “being on topic” is your concern?

  13. Bush is now the gold standard for presidential behavior.
    I bet Timmy would’ve loved to find a pic of Bush 2 making a deep bow before the Japanese Emperor. But he can’t.
    It makes my heart glad, though, to think of the man-hours Soros wasted having the MM staff look for one.

  14. Bowing, smooching, holding hands, it’s all good
    Tim reveals the agenda of a St. Paul DFL caucus meeting.

  15. For reference, the nations that received the most Marshall Plan aid took the longest time to recover. So the argument that it “worked” is tenuous at best.

    Thank God we won that war, but….

  16. Truman was a loyal Democrat.
    OK. The atomic bombings of 1940s Japan and the Korean War were “evil”, but obviously have nothing to do with Harry Truman. Doo doo doo, doo doo doo-doo-doo doo . . .

    He actually served in a war.
    Funny. That didn’t seem to help John McCain any . . .

    …signed the Marshall Plan, spending buttloads of money in Europe.
    Hmm… I seem to remember your friends at City Pages derisively referring to that as: ” Operation European Freedom “. What changed?

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