It’s been a while.  Let’s do a meme:

1. The phone rings. Who will it be?

Mortgage sales weasels.  Over and over and over and over and over…

2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart?

Always. They’re no fun for joyriding anymore.

3. In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener?

I wind up talking a lot, which stinks, since I’d rather listen…

4. Do you take compliments well?

Well?  Sure.  Gracefully?  Not so much.  Often?  Pshaw.

5. Do you play Sudoku?

I’ve never even thought about starting.

6. If abandoned alone in the wilderness, would you survive?

For how long?  I probably know some of the basics well enough to get by for a while.  On a desert island with nothing but a volleyball for company?  That might be trouble.

7. Did you ever go to camp as a kid?

Music camp in 7th and 8th grade.

8. What was your favorite game as a kid?

“Escape”.  It was a fairly elaborate and utterly engrossing game we could only play on my dad’s (brick) porch.  It was an L-shaped porch.  The game involved two “guards” and any number of “POWs”.  The “POWs” stayed at the top of the “L”.  One “guard” walked back and forth on the bottom of the “L”; the other, back and forth in my dad’s side yard (below the bottom of the “L”).  The “POWs'” goal was to make it, utterly unseen, back to my Dad’s garage.  They’d jump off the dropoff at the top of the “L”, and try to sneak back to the garage.  But if a “guard” saw them at any point and yelled out “FREEZE” and their name and location (“FREEZE!  Radish, behind the garbage can!”), they were “busted” and had to sit in the “Cooler” (yes, we’d all just watched The Great Escape) at the bottom of the “L” for five minutes; if you got busted twice, you had to be a “guard” (so everyone got rotated through pretty fast).

Although the guards had to walk (broadly) back and forth, getting to the garage was a lot harder than it sounds.  You could shoot straight across the back yard – but it was fairly open, and you’d get caught.  Or you could sneak around the neighbors’ houses – but the mad dash to the garage was pretty exposed.  Or you could crawl down the sidewalk all the way around the block and work your way up the alley – but the guard at the bottom of the “L” had a decent vantage point to catch that sort of thing.  It taught us all a lot of useful skills; stealth, psychology,

My dad, naturally, hated having scads of pre-teens jumping off his porch and crawling about neighbors’ yards.  I didn’t really understand why until I had kids of my own.  But it was a great game, if I say so myself – and yes, I invented most of it.

9. If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew she was married, would you?

Noooo. Not even for Scarlett Johannson.

10. Could you date someone with different religious beliefs than you?

Nope.  It’s been a bit of a buzzkill on a few otherwise promising dates over the past ten years.

11. Do you like to pursue or be pursued?

Total pursuer.

12. Use three words to describe yourself?

Gary Larson Lives.

13. Do any songs make you cry?

I never cry.  But if I did, and songs could provoke it, it’d probably be “Here Comes a Regular” by the Replacements.

14. Are you continuing your education?

Always. Just not formally.

15. Do you know how to shoot a gun?

Yes!  And I love it!  It’s the best stress relief there is that doesn’t require another person.

16. Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth?

Nope.

17. How often do you read books?

Daily?

18. Do you think more about the past, present or future?

Probably the future.  It’s really my big hope.

19. What is your favorite children’s book?

Love You Forever.

20.What color are your eyes?

Blue.

21. How tall are you?

6’5.

22. Where is your dream house located?

On a wilderness island a fifteen minute boat ride from Manhattan.

23. If your house was on fire, what would be the first thing you grabbed?

Assuming my kids are safe?  A photo album.

24. When was the last time you were at Olive Garden?

December, 2003.  Date from…well, not hell.  Date from Richfield.  That’s it.

25. Where was the furthest place you traveled today?

So far?  I picked up my laptop by my bed.  Around 8:30, I’ll bike to work.

26. Do you like mustard?

I love love love the coarse-ground German stuff, with the whole marinaded mustard seeds.  I actually eat that with a spoon.