The Minnesota Twins Mpeg discount tix prices to the Dow:

The Twins will discount certain seats for Monday home games, based on the Dow Jones Industrials. The promotion will tie the cost of tickets in the “Home Run Porch” area in lower left field to the number the Dow closes at on the preceding Friday.

For example, if it’s in the 8,000s on Friday, those seats will cost $8 on Monday. If it’s in the 7,000s, it’s $7.

The regular price of those seats is $21. The deal excludes the April 6 opener and Memorial Day, and there’s a limit of eight tickets per person.

The way forward from this is obvious: as long as Obama is in office, we can count on more carnage on the Dow.  So I plan on borrowing some friends’ tickets, short-selling them in anticipation of big Monday morning selloffs reacting to bad economic choices Obama tries to hide after 5PM Friday, taking the call-back, and making a ton of money.

Then, I plan on offering a derivatative security based on the price fluctuation in Twins tickets, not so much because I think it’s a good idea for a security as the incarceration of Petters, Madoff and Stillwater leave a huge hole in the “ready to pluck a sucker” market, and what could be better to plug that gap than a derivative based on the shorting of baseball tickets?

Soon, I’ll own the Netherlands – hopefully before the Ticket Bubble bursts.  And best of all, the Obama Administration will bail me out!

Go Twins!  And Go Bears!

This entry was posted by by Mitch Berg on Friday, March 6th, 2009 at 8:40 pm and is filed under A 'n E, Business, The Economy and The Markets. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.