I Am Still An American

By Mitch Berg

It doesn’t really make any difference to me that Barack Obama won the election.  Oh, it does mean that I gotta get down to business selling an alternative vision for 2010, but that’s just politics.

I’m still an American.

For that matter, had Socialist Gloria La Riva or wackjob Cyn McKinney won, I’d still be an American.  A disappointed and (to say the least) very politically motivated one, but an American nonetheless.

With that in mind, I’m going to depart from my traditional genial civility to say – and I say this with all due respect – every single person on  this website can eat sh*t and die a painful death.

That is all.

 Oh, who am I kidding.  No, it’s not.

I mean, weren’t these the same self-adoring nutslaps who got the vapors everytime they felt someone was “questioning their patriotism?”

I guess I’m not just writing this to be snarky or mean. Sitting as I am on the “out of power” side of things, I’m pondering the road back.  And I listen to stories like this woman, Rachel Zucker, whom I heard on American Public Media’s “The Story”.   The woman – an “artist”, a poet in this case – has lived her entire life in a society that has enough surplus wealth to afford her the opportunity to be an “artist”, rather than a farmer or a filth-shoveler or a prostitute.

And yet she had the gall to go on “The Story” and say that the Bush years “filled me witha profound sense of disenfranchisement”.  Actually, you should listen to the whole piece; the “Listen” button is at the bottom of the page.  It’s clogged with cringe-worthy moment, the kinds of thing I’d hope Ms. Zucker will find embarassing someday, but somehow doubt it’ll happen.

We try to share a country with these crybabies.

UPDATE:  OK, not everyone can undertake what I suggested; there are more than a few hoax signatures.  Including mine. 

8 Responses to “I Am Still An American”

  1. Troy Says:

    “We try to share a country with these crybabies”

    Does every post have to be about angryclown? 😉

  2. Master of None Says:

    See if you can find my signature on their pledge

    http://jackofalltradesblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/jointhemilitary.jpg

  3. Kermit Says:

    Sunshine Patriots. These are the sort of people you do NOT want to watch your back.

  4. angryclown Says:

    True. Angryclown would secretly tape a sign on Kermit’s back saying: “I like it in the butt” or “Ask me why I’m named after a Muppet.”

  5. Mitch Berg Says:

    You’re still sore about that “Never Stop Kicking Me” bit, aren’t you?

    For the thousandth time – sorry.

  6. swiftee Says:

    “Angryclown would secretly tape a sign on Kermit’s back saying: “I like it in the butt” ”

    Would you use the same script it’s tatooed in on the back of your neck?

  7. angryclown Says:

    Wow, Shiftee, again with the “I know you are, but what am I?” riposte. You just wait around for Angryclown to craft a clever jape, then try to turn it back around?

    Seriously, Shiftee, if you can’t get off a decent insult, you really aren’t good for anything.

  8. Kermit Says:

    You just wait around for Angryclown to craft a clever jape
    And wait….and wait…and wait….

    Mitch, Twitter me if he ever gets around to it.

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