Some Advice For You Grasshopper

By Johnny Roosh

Mr. Oprahma, the worst President in modern history is on line two and would like a word.

A Past President’s Advice to Obama: Act With Haste

Almost three decades later, Jimmy Carter recalls vividly what it was like trying to get Americans to turn down their thermostats and kick the oil habit.

“It was like gnawing on a rock,” the former president says.

…speaking from experience.

Now President-elect Barack Obama is heading to Washington with a set of energy goals as ambitious as Mr. Carter’s back in 1976. He promises to free the country from “the tyranny of foreign oil” and to save “our planet for our children.”

…so they can live to give…60% of their earnings to fill in the hole that you’ve dug for them.

He’s calling for a “spirit of service and sacrifice,” and promoting hybrid cars and wind and solar power.

Guys, guys. It’s the economy, stupids.

By the way, “That One”,  a “spirit of service and sacrifice?”

Huh?

Is that what you call your proposed largest-ever ginormous government economic stimulus program?

Obama would be wise to spend his dwindling political capital on the economy. Four years won’t be long enough to get to what should be ninth or tenth on your “Things to Do If I Become The Messiah” list.

But Mr. Obama must now champion his $150 billion energy plans in the face of a sinking economy and oil prices that have fallen 70% since their record mid-summer high. Forces like these have killed at least four similar presidential efforts in the past. Already, falling energy prices and the credit crisis are laying waste to scores of alternative-energy projects, from huge wind farms in Texas to biodiesel plants in Mr. Carter’s home state of Georgia.

As it should be. Priorities being what they are.

Mr. Carter offers Mr. Obama this advice: Try to inspire Americans to see the virtue in making energy sacrifices, a notoriously tough sell, especially in the face of falling prices. Get energy legislation to Congress quickly, during the presidential honeymoon. And stick with it.

Don’t worry that people are losing jobs, retail is down double digits, the national debt clock in New York City to be pulled down for lack of digits and the auto industry – well never mind about them.

Speaking of sticking it, Mr. Carter…how’d that all work out for you?

“I think he can prevail if he does it early and with a great deal of dedication and enthusiasm — and with tenacity,” Mr. Carter says in an interview.

What out-of-work journalist sought to rejuvenate their career by interviewing Jimmuh?

Mr. Carter says he had a key advantage over Mr. Obama — a national sense that something had to be done: “The energy crisis that I inherited was in many ways much more serious than it is now.”

And yet he also failed. While you’re at it Mr. Former-Crappy-President, any stock tips?

Just two weeks into his presidency, Mr. Carter gave his famous “fireside chat” on energy. Clad in a yellow cardigan that now hangs in his presidential museum

…because no one else wanted it

Please pass the malaise…

Later, in his most politically costly address dubbed by critics the “malaise speech,” Mr. Carter announced a massive program to boost solar power and make synthetic fuel from coal. He vowed the U.S. would never again import more oil than it did in 1977.

…and a two-hour movie would soon fit on a small thin shiny disk. Oh, sorry. That actually did happen.

Mr. Carter concedes that his battles over energy policy cost him political support. “It sapped away a substantial portion of my domestic influence to harp on this unpleasant subject for four solid years,” he says.

Oh, well in that case, Mr. Oprahma should make great haste to  heed this most sage advice of the wise and revered former President.

At 84 years old, Mr. Carter hasn’t lost his fascination for the subject that helped to define his presidency. Eight years ago, he planted 10 acres of paulownia trees on several fields around his house. Native to China, the trees are among the fastest growing in the world. His groves already stand more than 50 feet tall. He sent one of the trees this summer to a lab at the University of Georgia, where it was pulped and turned into ethanol.

…and he sits in a rocker on his porch, donning another yellow cardigan, sipping it.

7 Responses to “Some Advice For You Grasshopper”

  1. penigma Says:

    Or, he could heed the words of George Bush .. that would work, yep

    http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/politics/2008/12/11/am.intv.brody.bush.bible.cnn

    Of course, he’d offend you right-wing extremist bible bleating crowd. Bush was a poser, Carter much more honest. You want to talk crappy Presidents, Bush was a faux hyper-bible thumper, lousy on the economy, lousy on Iraq, lousy on terrorism, lousy on everything. Carter – well he investigated his friends, he investigated corruption… what a jerk.

    BTW Roosh, someday, like the Jolson thing, you may catch on that the ‘mailaise factor’ predated Carter as a genesis, and Carter failed due to his assault on corruption through the Arab-Scam investigations where he alienated his own party.

  2. Mitch Berg Says:

    Carter much more honest.

    Well, no. Carter was pretty much an artifice from the word go. And the way he ran to the Soviets to try to get cooperation in the ’80 election was one of the most dismal moments in American history – truly a nadir.

    You want to talk crappy Presidents, Bush was a faux hyper-bible thumper, lousy on the economy, lousy on Iraq, lousy on terrorism, lousy on everything.

    Well, you were half-right on one (the economy) out of five. That’s 20%. You’re improving.

  3. JRoosh Says:

    Bush also at least did well enough to get reelected.

    Carter was ousted at halftime.

  4. buzz Says:

    Oh God. I am old enough to remember the Carter years. Only way the Carter years could have been worse would have been for him to have Dodd and Frank in office to wreck the credit market.
    “bible bleating crowd.” Right. Carter was known for not pointing out his religion. Every 5 minutes. Possibly the most judgemental President we ever had. I’m sure we as a country disappointed him for not living up to his standards.
    Takes a special kind of jackass to uphold the Carter years as something to strive for.

  5. Dog Gone Says:

    Our own U of MN came up with a form of bio diesel that relies on a bacterial processing of sewage, which has got to be one of the most renewable resources ever. Doesn’t require tying up land to produce, fuel to process, or interfere with food supplies. And the bacterial process reduces the cost of treating waste to clean up our water at the same time.

    Scientific advances like that might just provide Obama an advantage in solving the energy crisis that hasn’t been available to our previous presidents. One can hope.

  6. Terry Says:

    Peev, can you actually cite an example of Bush “hyper Bible-thumping”? Or even ordinary “Bible thumping”? Or are just talking out of your nether orifice again?

  7. Bike Bubba Says:

    Doggone, hopefully it works. I recently got a mailing from my alma mater (Michigan State), where it almost point blank stated that the development of cellulosistic ethanol (for which MSU is getting millions of funding) more or less hinged on petroleum hitting $200/ barrel or more.

    It will be sadly amusing to see how many people get their PhDs by re-hashing that basic statement; well, if we can ONLY get people to pay really through the nose for gasoline…..

    If septic diesel (boweldiesel?) gets private funding, it has a chance. If only government funding, it’s that proverbial snowball.

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