Since We’re On The Subject (“A Piece Of The Action” Predux)
By Mitch Berg
BACKGROUND: Oops. I thought I’d posted this on Friday. I apparently did not. And since this piece is intended to mock the story behind this post, it’s probably only fair that I actually post this, and pronto. I apologize for any confusion, stress or altered worldviews due to this mixup on my staff’s part).
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There are plenty of conservatives who scoff at the idea of art as a noble goal in and of itself – at the notion that art can be something other than decoration or background music.
I’m not one of them.
But I’ll say this; when art becomes a creature of subsidy – a hothouse flower that can only exist when the government foots the bill – then it’s dead.
Sisyphus at Nihilist in Golf Pants details the “winners” of Minnesota State Arts board subsidies – grants from a couple of hundred bucks up to $6,000.
There are the usual predictable howlers:
Peter B. Becker Nelson, Minneapolis
$6,000 — to purchase video equipment and create a new video work that explores themes of relationships, empathy, sexuality, and genderWonderful. The taxpayers of Minnesota are buying this guy video equipment to explore themes of relationships, empathy, sexuality, and gender – themes that would never be artistically explored without our tax dollars. Once Mr. Nelson is done with that, perhaps he will do a video version of his mustache series (a previous work where he drew mustaches on photographs of people).
…
John S. Jodzio, Minneapolis
$5,700 — to finish his short story collection, If You Lived Here, You’d Already Be Home
Finally, someone has written a short story collection based on the popular apartment rental sign!
Now, I’m not one of those guys who’s going to mock an “artist” for producing something that reeks of smug self-indulgence – art often reflects the artists, and an awful lot of artists are smug and self-indulgent, and that’s just fine.
And I’m not one of those people who thinks art needs to be “accessible”.
I do think, however, that art benefits greatly from the struggle to create it. And judging by the almost uniformly dismal quality of the “art” produced on the public nickel…:
Arlene Atwater, Duluth
$3,000 — for time to polish two new short stories, record them in her own voice on MP3 files embracing the new literary dimension of voice-only literature, and submit them to boundoff.com and Write On Radio, KFAI
…much of what we’re funding could use a little struggle.
The goal of art isn’t necessarily to last forever – but why do I suspect the “art” we’re funding has a shorter-than-average shelf-life?
December 1st, 2008 at 4:30 pm
“I apologize for any confusion, stress or altered worldviews due to this mixup on my staff’s part).”
See? Time to give JDoosh his walking papers. He’s an albatross around your neck. Nay, a millstone!
By the way, the nickname “JDoosh” is a reference to the German, “Dusche,” meaning “shower.” For all his faults, JDoosh seems like somebody who practices good hygiene. April fresh he is!
December 1st, 2008 at 4:42 pm
Time to give JDoosh his walking papers
That alone is ample grounds for promotion.
Roosh – you are now Executive Associate Publisher!
December 1st, 2008 at 4:45 pm
So, Berg, when did you turn into Lileks?
December 1st, 2008 at 5:44 pm
I published a novel and am attempting to market it myself. What am I doing wrong? You mean I could just petition government for the funds and skip the whole “marketplace” concept altogether? What a country!
And, as for Mr. Nelson’s grant: “$6,000 — to purchase video equipment and create a new video work that explores themes of relationships, empathy, sexuality, and gender”
Don’t know about you but it sounds to me like an application to fund porn. Should be interesting to witness Mr. Nelson’s “body of work.”
December 1st, 2008 at 5:47 pm
See? Time to give JDoosh his walking papers. He’s an albatross around your neck.
Obsess much, mangy clown?
December 1st, 2008 at 6:01 pm
This Blog is now the Crown that legitimizes my station.
December 1st, 2008 at 6:16 pm
“There are plenty of conservatives who scoff at the idea of art as a noble goal in and of itself – at the notion that art can be something other than decoration or background music.”
Who are these uncooth cretins of which you speak, Mitch?
Listen, just because AccClown threatens to withhold his favors from us, and Flush has gone completely over the edge (poor little boob), does not mean you must needs apply self-depreciation to salve the ‘batties frazzled synapse.
Conservatives are the most cultured of all. Indeed, the world must now rely on the steady hand of conservativism to keep the savage cum liberal from demanding that the Pieta isn’t complete without a drapery of human waste and a few well placed hammer blows to convey the angst the world feels.
In short, I demand a retraction!
December 1st, 2008 at 7:01 pm
What is surprising is not that the Arts Board has funded works that are unlikely to stand the test of time, but that anyone expects them to fund anything worthwhile.
Surveys of art history routinely show that the masterpieces tend not to be appreciated in their day, with only occasional exceptions. It is surprising when good public art, much less great art, is funded by anyone, ever. It is a great blessing that any of it is.
So – is it a reasonable to expect the Minnesota Arts Board to be more proficient? Probably not. It is fun to give them grief, and contributes to keeping any smug self congratulation of their taste in check.
Most of what is exalted in it’s own time disappears into oblivion, whether it is the latest thrill of the masses, or the favorites of the supposed few elite cultured and supposedly ‘savy’.
The same is almost certainly the long term fate of most of the stuff benefitting from the Arts Board $$$$$$$$$$.
Much of the art that HAS passed the tests of time and ongoing art criticism as masterpieces has been called pornographic at one time or another.
That is perhaps not the best criteria for validation. Nor is $$$$$$.
December 1st, 2008 at 7:05 pm
Swiffer said: “Conservatives are the most cultured of all.”
And the cultures usually turn up positive for syphilis and anal warts.
December 1st, 2008 at 7:21 pm
God, that was weak; you’re really off your game AssClown.
You’re going to have to step up to the plate, or we’re gonna smack you around some more….really love those pretty, pretty tears you squirt!
BTW, leave it to you to worry about anal warts….I guess those little buggers really must be a bother when they get wedged into your ears, huh?
See? That’s how it’s done…now get with the program or go back to your refrigerator box and wait until we call you.
December 1st, 2008 at 7:46 pm
This Ass is the Clown that Legitimizes my Regurgitation.
December 1st, 2008 at 8:21 pm
Angryclown promises to leave forever and returns minutes later.
Typical liberal: promises nirvana and delivers purgatory.
Too bad he isn’t the one purged.
December 1st, 2008 at 8:33 pm
Too bad he isn’t the one purged.
Yet.
Remember – the first ones Stalin offed were the ones that were too close to him.
December 1st, 2008 at 8:39 pm
I feel it is time to publish my annual disclaimer in re my old friend Angryclown.
Everyone: He is here to yank chains. As some creatures feed on plankton or dung, the Clown feeds on the flailing ire created by his chain-yanking. To react with anger is to play directly into his big floppy hands.
Far better to respond in kind; to match chain yank with chain yank.
For example:
“Syphilis? Aren’t spyrochaetes the state animal of your home state of New Jersey?”
There. My annual disclaimer obligation is fulfilled.
December 1st, 2008 at 8:50 pm
Aren’t spyrochaetes the state animal of your home state of New Jersey?
New Jersey? I thought AC was from South Carolina, is a huge NY Yankees fan and thinks Al Sharpton is the greatest man who ever lived.
December 1st, 2008 at 9:08 pm
You wingnut racists are all wack-o! How’s sleeping with George Bush’s mother working out for you! Fous le camps et morte, campagnard abruti!
I’m Auditioning for the part of the new Angry Clown. I know, big shoes to fill.
Ha! I crack myself up again!
December 1st, 2008 at 10:05 pm
No, no, no. A spyrochaete is a pasta. AC is not FROM New Jersey, he BUYS a new jersey when his cousins get married. His hometown is actually Butt Monkey, Arkansas. Their team name is the Flaming Hemmorhoids and he served for four years as their mascot – a 6-foot suppository.
That oughta clear up the confusion.
December 1st, 2008 at 10:44 pm
a 6-foot suppository
Too generous. Just for the mental picture, in Kermit’s mind’s eye, Angryclown is Wallace Shawn.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wallace_Shawn
December 1st, 2008 at 10:50 pm
I feel it is time to publish my annual disclaimer in re my old friend Angryclown.
Everyone: He is here to yank chains.
That’s not all he yanks.
December 2nd, 2008 at 9:01 am
Wow, when you kooks unleash your collective comedic genius, the result is… Well, keep your day jobs. Oh right, you don’t have day jobs. Or night jobs. Anyhoo, always fun to watch Shiftee flail about when Angryclown slaps him around like the Great White Dope-du-jour against Angryclown’s Ali.
“BTW, leave it to you to worry about anal warts….I guess those little buggers really must be a bother when they get wedged into your ears, huh?
See? That’s how it’s done…”
Ever notice Swiffer always grabs Angryclown’s insult, turns it around in a way that doesn’t quite work, then boasts that he’s delivered the killer smackdown?
It’s hard to keep up, Swiff. Angryclown’s just smarter, wittier, better educated. Gonna go out on a limb and guess *you* didn’t go to that fancy school in Evanston. But I’m sure that refrigerator repair program at the community college was extremely competitive.
December 2nd, 2008 at 9:52 am
Far better to respond in kind; to match chain yank with chain yank.
Come on, Mitch, that’s what my comment was meant to do! Insult the clown and liberals with a mention of religion? How many more flags should we put in front of the bull(sh*tter)?
Angryclown’s just smarter, wittier, better educated.
Certainly not than a 5th grader. Although I will grant Angryclown’s humor might rise to the sophomoric level if we’re being generous.
December 2nd, 2008 at 1:20 pm
Gonna go out on a limb and guess *you* didn’t go to that fancy school in Evanston.
So you went to Bessie Rhodes Magnet School? Congratulations!