Other Gift Ideas For Barack Obama

Perhaps you’ve heard about Barack Obama’s new bridal registry, wherein couples can opt to have wedding guests give to Barack Obama in lieu of (or in addition to) wedding gifts.

It’s a brilliant idea, of course – bolster anemic small-donor giving by instituting a voluntary tax on life’s little joys, just one little bit of asceticism for the greater good.

But why stop with weddings?

With that in mind – my top ten other ideas to help “gift” America and the world with four more years of Barack Obama:

6. You kids’ birthday money – If Obama wins, every day will be a birthday party!

5. Bar/Bat Mitzvahs – With news that the Jewish vote is eroding, it’s way past time to get the younger generation on board!  Today you are a Democrat!  Mazel Tov!

4. Grandma’s Nursing Home Budget – You can clean out that spare bedroom, for the good of the country, right?

3. Your Internet Access bill – good Democrats should be getting their news from NBC anyway, right?

2. Your pledge to MPR – Let’s face it, if Obama loses, the Republicans are going to send tanks to the studios anyway.  Just like they did during the Bush Administration.

1. Your “Friday Night On The Town” money – Why should newlyweds carry all the burden?  Instead of wasting money trying to get some desirable of your preferred gender to go home with you, donate the money to Obama!  Republicans will just outlaw sex if they win, anyway, right?


10 thoughts on “Other Gift Ideas For Barack Obama

  1. I’m waiting for the ad that tells me to cash in my kid’s college funds to send to the reelection effort.
    After all, if those evil Republicans win, college will go back to being only for the rich, Pell Grants will disappear, and student loan rates will be slightly higher than you can get from your local loan shark. Thus, the only way my kids will be able to go to college is if the Dems win, so I might as well send them all the money instead of investing it.

  2. Hey, all you kids who just opened those Graduation cards looking for money – good news! We sent to the President. You’ll be paying his bills for the rest of your life anyway, best to start now.

  3. There was a story on the internets last week about a ‘Sconnie teacher who shorted her restaurant server with a 10% tip and noted on the receipt that it was Scott Walker’s fault that she couldn’t go the full 15%.
    How about doing the same to waitstaff at your local Denny’s or in the case of Learned Foot Esq., your local Le Bilboquet – short the tip and write on the receipt that portion of their tip money is going to help Barry.
    By the way – Best of the Web had a good idea – buy a funeral card noting “Sorry for Your Loss” and accidentally send it to the Barry’s re-election committee.

  4. Pingback: Other Gift Ideas For Barack Obama | Shot in the Dark | Political Blogs Watch

  5. I’m sure that our resident left wingnut trolls, doggy doo, angryclown and inSanity, are already lining up their contributions for the next 10 years to attempt to get their Dictator in Chief re-elected!

  6. I got the best gift idea. A promise to vote for a good President on November 6 Mitt Romney! If Obama’s policies are so good and Romney’s by 2016 it will be crystal clear to the country just how great a man Obama was!

    Walter Hanson
    Minneapolis, MN

  7. While we’re on the subject, tell your children that you are putting their allowance in an escrow account to help them pay the $15 trillion federal debt. I’m sure they will thank you some day.

  8. Great idea Kerm! Since our children owe about $115K and change as of today, they should get a head start!

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