Did you know I’m a clairvoyant?
Either did anyone else!
SCENE: Tanya Grumpleman-Morriss, 21, a Grievance Studies major at Bard College, is making her new sign for the next day’s “Occupy” Rally. The entire scene takes place in her head.
GRUMPLEMAN-MORRISS: My last sign was such a success…
…I need to come up with something equally catchy, profound and cogent.
GRUMPLEMAN-MORRISS rips a big square out of a box for a big-screen TV.
GRUMPLEMAN-MORRISS: Hm. It’s a beautiful night. The stars are like crystals. Hm. There we go! “It’s a Crystal Night for the 1%”
She scibbles the saying frantically onto the sign. Then she goes to the dorm fridge and grabs a Red Bull.
GRUMPLEMAN-MORRISS: (quaffing the Red Bull) Hmm. I’m on a roll. What else? I’m so tired of having to worry about the future. We need to come up with a…a final solution!
She frantically tears out another square from a Macintosh box.
GRUMPLEMAN-MORRISS: ” We need a Final Solution to rebalance our society!” (Whispers sotto voce): Perfect!
She gets up and makes a cup of coffee with one of those Keurig individual coffee makers.
GRUMPLEMAN-MORRISS: Maybe we need to ennoble the concept for working for a living…Hey! Perfect!
She frantically rips out another square.
GRUMPLEMAN-MORRISS: “Dear 1%: Work makes you free!”
She admires her handiwork.
GRUMPLEMAN-MORRISS: Goddess, those Teabaggers are culturally illiterate!