You see when it snows like this – you know, constant, fine, light snow, the roads get slippery and when you hit the gas you slip and slide.
You sit and spin.
The thing is…ever since I got this car with all-wheel-drive, when I hit the gas, I just go.
Rain, snow, small animals, volcanic ash. Nothing can stop me!
Yes!!! It’s like I’m a God!!!!!
Lord of the Lanes! Baron of the Boulevard! Potentate of the Interstate!
Four-wheeled power – an advantage, right?! Sure…if you’re not in front of me when the light turns green.
And when you are, I get so very anxious. I’ve become an all-wheel-drive snob and I’m not proud of it.
“C’mon! Letsgo letsgo letsgo letsgo letsgo letsgo letsgo letsgo letsgo! What?! Are you paid by the hour!!!”
(not that there’s anything wrong with that)
It’s like being the guy that gets frustrated and everyone thinks is so annoying because his Mensa IQ affords him the luxury of “getting” things so much quicker, but then he has to wait until everyone else catches up while he rolls his eyes.
He’s not the one that gets the girl, is he.
Like that insipid commercial for AT&T where the portly passenger with the fastest network gets the download quicker than everyone else in the car, and laughs out loud. Thirty more seconds go by and the rest of the passengers get the download and do the same.
They’re the popular ones. They’re late, but having all the fun.
It’s lonely at the top.
This winter we’ve had way more than our share of snow and as a result we’ve been sitting in lines, three lanes wide, like cattle in a slaughter line, waiting waiting waiting to get to the office or home.
And there I sit, with the power to go go go!!! …if it weren’t for the 1985 Crown Vic in front of me.
It’s like a curse.
God I miss my Harley.