Fair Memes Or Foul

From Red:

1. Is your second toe longer than your first?
I actually had to check.  They’re right about even.

2. Do you have a favorite type of pen?
I very rarely write with pens.  I’m a mechanical pencil guy.  But I love Pilot Fine-Liners; very fine, smooth rollerball, never snags the paper.  Also gel-pens, although I never actually buy them.  I have almost illegible handwriting no matter what I write with; people think I’m writing in Hebrew.

3. Look at your planner for March 14, what are you doing?
My daughter has an appointment, and there’s a standing team meeting that day.

I’m not kidding.

4. What color are your toenails usually?
Umm…toenail colored.  Usually.

5. What was the last thing you highlighted?
The Minnesota DFL’s logical vacuity?

Oh, OK.  Seriously, now.

I’m not a fundamentally organized person. I have to work at it. 

So one of my monday morning rituals at work is that I print off all of my meeting placeholders from Outlook, and highlight the subject, time and location.  I then paperclip the sheet to the file folder that holds the info related to the meeting, and put the folders on the marker-tray of my whiteboard, in order from left to right.  That way I can just grab them, and read where I’m supposed to be as I walk to the meeting.

No, I’m far from OCD; indeed, I’m probably neurotically disorganized.  Hence the highlighting.

6. What color are your bedroom curtains?
Sort of off-white.  I think.

7. What color are the seats in your car?
Sort of off-white.  I’m more sure about them.  They’re leather, and thank heavens they’re light-colored in the summer.

8. Have you ever had a black and white cat?
Two.  One that died three years ago, and one we got last year.  Unrelated, and yet almost identical.

9. What is the last thing you put a stamp on?
An amended tax return to the IRS.

10. Do you know anyone who lives in Wyoming?
Yes.  Who doesn’t?

11. Why did you withdraw cash from the ATM the last time?
Kids’ allowances!

12. Whose is the last baby that you held?
Good question – probably one of my own.  Or, possibly, one of his kids, when they were really little. 

“Holding babies” is a long story for me; I used to be terrified of it, when I was in my teens and early twenties.  They hated me; I never held a baby that didn’t immediately start squalling like I was jabbing it with a knitting needle.  Then I had my own, and got very comfortable with it. 

13. Unlucky #?
None!  But eight is my favorite.

14. Do you like Cinnamon toothpaste?
I’ve never seen or tried it.  But I think I would.  The hotter the better.

But then I’d dig garlic toothpaste, too. 

Mmmm.  Garlic.

15. What kind of car were you driving 2 years ago?

The same one I have now.  A Ford Taurus.

16. Pick one: Miami Hurricanes or Florida Gators?
The Bears.

17. Last time you went to Six Flags?
Never been to a Six Flags.  We have Valleyfair here, and the last time was probably two years ago.  I’m due.

18. Do you have any wallpaper in your house?
Bathroom – some fairly atrocious stuff that’s peeling faster than I can keep track of it.  I need to remove it.

And some stuff in my kitchen that everyone hates – yellowish off-tan with zillions of tiny stylized flowers.  When my daughter was little – like, two – I asked her what they were.  She said “suckers”.  I’ve been sentimentally attached to the stuff since then.  It DOES have to go, but I’ll probably keep a square of it in a little frame, for my own purely sentimental reasons.

19. Closest thing to you that is yellow?
My collection of legal pads, mostly full-up with notes.

20. Last person to give you a business card?
Some GOP operative at Keegans one night.

21. Who is the last person you wrote a check to?
Rainbow Foods, when I lost my check card a few months back.

22. Closest framed picture to you?
Me and my kids, from about ten years ago.

23. Last time you had someone cook for you?
Outside of a restaurant?  Good question.  Probably the last time I was dating someone halfways seriously.  Getting toward a year now.

24. Have you ever applied for welfare?
No.  I’ve been on unemployment three times (once for just one check), but never welfare.

25. How many emails do you have?
Counting everything, including a few I never use?  Probably seven or eight.

26. Last time you received flowers?
Opening night of Lion in Winter, my sophomore year in college.  I played Henry II, and if I say so myself, I was mighty good.   

27. Do you think the sanctity of marriage is meant for only a man & woman?
I don’t fundamentally see marriage as a civil contract; it’s a religious thing.  I’m not opposed to civil unions (a contract).  I used to actually try to find a reason to support gay marriage – but I can see no reason congruent with my religious beliefs that it makes sense. 

28. Do you play air guitar?
Air guitar, air keyboards (Hammond B-3, usually), air drums (and finger-drumming), and, lately, a HELL of a lot of air bass.

29. Has anyone ever proposed to you?
Yes.  But not marriage!

30. Do you take anything in your coffee?
Two Splenda and a dash of half and half.  Always.

31. Do you have any Willow Tree figurines?
Is this a message to terrorists?

32. What is/was your high school’s rival mascot?
The Magicians.  Not sure what their actual mascot was, but every time Minot came to town to play hockey, some of the locals would toss dead rabbits on the ice.  Magician…rabbit…

Oh, ask Kouba.

33. Last person you spoke to from high school?
Well, I have a gratifying number of high school friends who read this blog.  Does that count as “speaking?”

Mark showed up at the demonstration on Saturday.  We go back to about ninth grade:


 He’s on the far right.

34. Last time you used hand sanitizer?
The company I work for manufactures the stuff.  I get it for about 70% off at the company store. So while I almost never used it (outside of Satellites) before, I have it in the bathroom today.

35. Would you like to learn to play the drums?
I play the drums.  Not well, and it’s been a while, but with a little practice, I’d be serviceable.  My only “professional” experience was playing in a summer-stock production of Cabaret one year.

36. What color are the blinds in your living room?

38. Last thing you read in the newspaper?
I flipped through the Pioneer Press the other day; I forget what I read.

39. What was the last pageant you attended?
My entire life is a rich pageant of wonder.

Otherwise, I’ve never been.

40. What is the last place you bought pizza from?
“Checkerboard Pizza” in the Midway.  Not bad.

41. Have you ever worn a crown?
In ninth grade, German Club threw a “Karnaval” party.  I wore the “prinz” crown for a bit.

42. What is the last thing you stapled?
User research forms for a meeting I have to run tomorrow.

43. Did you ever drink clear Pepsi?
One time.  Yick.

44. Are you ticklish?
At times.  It’s mostly psychological.

45. Last time you saw fireworks?
As the State Fair wrapped up.

46. Last time you had a Krispy Kreme doughnut?
Months ago – maybe last May?  Bought it at a gas station.  I don’t think I’ve had any since I started biking to work.

I think all the KK stores in the Twin Cities are closed now.

47. Who is the last person that left you a message & you actually returned it?
I usually return messages.  The last one was probably on my cell phone, from my son.

48. Last time you parked under a carport?
Never have!

49. Do you have a black dog?
Orange.  And before that, white with brown globs.

50 . Have you had your mid life crisis yet?
How do you define this?   I mean, I’ve been divorced for seven years, now, so it’s not like I’ve had forbidden longings I’ve had to sublimate to save my marriage.  I can’t afford to dash out and buy a Mitsubishi Eclipse. 

Not sure how you’d tell. 

51. Are you an aunt or uncle?
Yes, three four times over.

52. Who has the prettiest eyes that you know of?
My daugher’s.

53. What kind of soap or body wash do you use?
Soap:  Whatever’s on special.

Body Wash:  Whatever comes out of the faucet. 

54. Do you remember Ugly Kid Joe?
Gawd, yes.  I was at KDWB at the time, during their heyday (1991 or so).  Loved loved loved them.

55. Do you have a little black dress?
Where “dress” equals “handgun?”


10 thoughts on “Fair Memes Or Foul

  1. The Magicians. Not sure what their actual mascot was…

    Heh. In my time, the mascot was a cute cheerleader type who would dress up in a rabbit outfit, with long floppy ears.

  2. I thought nerdbert was gonna start singing that old Powerstation (Robert Palmer and the Taylors) song.

    “Are ya gonna do it?”

  3. Mitch,

    Was this a subtle abortion comment?

    “Holding babies” is a long story for me; I used to be terrified of it, when I was in my teens and early twenties. They hated me; I never held a baby that didn’t immediately start squalling like I was jabbing it with a knitting needle.”

  4. Was this a subtle abortion comment?

    Er, no. It’s a not-so-subtle way of saying that my high school classmates voted me “least likely to be legally allowed to have kids”.

  5. I have eight siblings and my husband has six. They are almost all married with kids and three of them are grandparents. I am aunt to 21 nieces, 20 nephews, 8 great nieces and six great nephews. If I include the spouses of my nieces and nephews, it would be up to 23 nieces and 25 nephews.

  6. I meant to delete that comment. After I wrote it I thought “who cares?” Then I hit the wrong button.

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