Definitions

SCENE: Mitch BERG is eating a skewer of souvlaki at a local greek joint when Avery LIBRELLE walks in. BERG tries to hide behind a menu, but LIBRELLE sees him, walks over.

LIBRELLE: Merg!

BERG: Oh, hey, Avery…

LIBRELLE: You people are so paranoid!

BERG: OK, I”ll bite. How, this time?

LIBRELLE: They’re not teaching Critical Race Theory in schools.

BERG: Do tell.

LIBRELLE: Critical race theory is taught in law schools and sociology programs.

BERG: Y’know, this reminds me of the conversation I have with anti-gunners, condescendingly cooing “nobody’s coming for your guns.

LIBRELLE: More paranoia. Nobody’s coming for your guns

BERG: Right. So I point out that politicians say that that’s exactly what they’re going to do – Joe Biden said it himself on is campaign website…

LIBRELLE: That’s just talk, not policy…

BERG: Right. That’s the inevitable next line. So I point to gun control legislation jammed down in New York, Colorado and Virginia in the past few years, and they say…(motions toward LIBRELLE)

LIBRELLE: They’re not coming for your guns right this moment.

BERG: Right. According to you all, I can’t be concerned about gun control until there’s a BATFE agent beating down my door with a photocopied warrant.

But let’s get back on subject. CRT…

LIBRELLE: Isn’t being taught.

BERG: The VIrginia Department of Education says it is.

LIBRELLE: But you can’t prove that it’s being taught in classrooms!

BERG: Teachers are most definitely teaching students that America is inseparably and irredeemably rooted in racism, that “whiteness” and racism are inseparable, that the police were originally an extension of Slave Patrols, and that the Second Amendment was framed to defend slavery and nothing more. All of which are part and parcel of CRT.

LIBRELLE: Again, CRT is taught in law schools and post-secondary education.

BERG: So none of those things are taught in schools.

LIBRELLE: Of course they are.

BERG: And they are all inseparable from CRT.

LIBRELLE: No. Its not CRT.

BERG: What is it, then?

LIBRELLE: It’s a theory about race, that criticizes.

BERG: But not CRT?

LIBRELLE: Of course not.

BERG: (looks down at menu). Look at how the price of pita has gone up…

LIBRELLE: (Looks down) Huh?

But BERG has slipped away.

And SCENE