SCENE:    At the garden center.  Mitch BERG is taking advantage of late-season blowouts when Avery LIBRELLE, carrying a lawn flamingo, steps around the corner, catching BERG by surprise. 

LIBRELLE:  Merg!  You keep claiming there’s vote fraud.  And yet there is not.  There never has been and there never will be.

BERG:  Well, the evidence in  California and Chicago and Philadelphia and Maryland and Florida and a key and very swingy district in Virginia and Mississippi and of course right here in Minnesota says you’re wrong.

LIBRELLE:  But the Brennan Center said there is no voter fraud!

BERG:  Leaving aside the fact that the Brennan Center is pretty much devoted to undermining self-government and making society safe for our “elite” better to govern as they see fit, their “sources” were pretty much all election authorities confirming that nothing is wrong, nosirreebob.  In most states where the fraud happens, it’s almost impossible to convict anyone for even the most bald-faced vote fraud.

LIBRELLE:  But there’s more evidence!

BERG:  Aaaand what’s that?

LIBRELLE:  You’re racist.  Hah!

(LIBRELLE turns and runs for the door)

BERG:  Clearly.


EDITOR’S NOTE:  Oooh, look there; an article about vote fraud.  Feel free to leave a comment in the comment section.

Unless, of course, you are one of the commenters who’s made a habit of leaving extremely long, usually off-topic, usually condescending comments, purporting to “fact-check” my content, but usually proving only that you’re a terrible researcher with no command of logic:

You’ll need to respond in depth to this question in a previous thread.  And respond to the responses.  And then I will start letting your comments out of moderation.  And only then.  Your call.  No skin off my teeth).

4 thoughts on “Evidence

  1. It might be time to dust off the “Lenfestey!” contest format and update it to make the quarantined canine commenter the source of mirth.

  2. I have some friends via The Facebook who work at the polls. This means they are the kindly people who check you in, hand you a ballot, direct you to the booth then hand you an “I Voted” sticker. All (are of different political persuasions) claim that there is no voter fraud and the few cases of it wouldn’t be enough to throw an election anyway. I have asked “how would you know if there WAS voter fraud”? The answers I have received haven’t been very convincing – mostly that it would impossible and there is no voter fraud and the few cases of it wouldn’t be enough to throw an election anyway. Then I have brought up the cases noted above and they say there is no voter fraud and the few cases of it wouldn’t be enough to throw an election anyway. Personally, I agree with them (there is very little voter fraud and the few cases of it wouldn’t be enough to throw an election anyway) but I wish the answer was better than the infinite loop and that they would be as obnoxious about prosecuting those guilty of voter fraud as they are about campaigns who put their candidates yard signs in the forbidden areas such as a right-of-way or with 1,200 inches of a polling place.

  3. There are few convictions for voter fraud; therefore, there is little voter fraud.

    There are no convictions for shooting people in Chicago over the weekend; therefore, no one was shot in Chicago over the weekend.

    There are few convictions for rape; therefore, there is little rape.

    I question whether we’re using the right metric to measure voter fraud.

  4. The more expansive version of that statement is “we cannot find any evidence of voter fraud.” And that is the truth, since nobody wants to LOOK for voter fraud, while writing the laws (and the election judge training manuals) in such a way that fraud is made both easy and invisible. And we know for proven FACT that election fraud has occurred on a scale sufficient to throw at least one election.

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