SCENE: Mitch BERG is sitting on his bike, waiting at a stoplight on northbound Hamline at County Road B. As he’s fishing his water bottle out of its holder, he doesn’t notice Avery LIBRELLE, riding an absurdly complex-looking recumbent bike, riding up from behind.
BERG: Aaaaah, sssshhhhhhure is a nice morning…
LIBRELLE: We need to deny healthcare to those who don’t get vaccines, so that the care goes to the more deserving.
BERG: You support single-payer healthcare, right?
LIBRELLE: Yes. It’s the only moral choice.
BERG: Huh. So – were you one of those those guy…er, gal…er, people who say “healthcare is a right”?
LIBRELLE: Absolutely! It is a human right, same as voting and housing and food!
BERG: Uh…OK. So – healthcare is a right – but rights can’t be legitimately taken away for anything but criminal behavior, and then only via some sort of due process. So – maintaining agency over one’s own body is criminal behavior?
BERG: A future, hypothetical, ultra-pro-life administration will be glad to hear that.
BERG: And since you called single-payer a moral choice – what’s moral about removing a person’s ability to say “Hey, I made a mistake, Vitamin D alone isn’t enough to counter my obesity and diabetes, where can I get some help, here?”
LIBRELLE: It’s too late! Hahahahahahahaha! Stupid Trumpkins!
BERG: Speaking of that – the two single biggest groups of voluntarily-unvaccinated are…
LIBRELLE: Stupid Trumpies and ultra-stupid Trumpies!
BERG: Well, no. People under thirty, and black males from 20-40. Young people because the messaging is so schizophrenic, and black males because the messaging is schjizophrenic and because of the medical industry’s history of using blacks as human test animals.
LIBRELLE: Oh, we’ve got people whose job that is.
(Light turns green. LIBRELLE abruptly accelerates away)
BERG: Of course you do.