The other day, we ran the video of Joel Rosenberg’s encounter with Minneapolis Police sergeant Bill Palmer, along with some derisive catcalls at the City Pages’ “coverage” of the incident.

Joel is, I should add for those who don’t follow science fiction literature or Second Amendment law, both a science fiction writer and the author of the definitive concealed carry bibles for both Minnesota and Missouri (?). 

Among many other things.

The following is Part I of Joel’s account of his encounter with Sergeant Palmer.

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The Palmer Fiasco:  Part One:  Why Joel Isn’t A Criminal

By Joel Rosenberg

A few preparatory matters…

The Palmer Fiasco is only a small part of what’s going on. I could get into the malicious, false arrest of my wife the dismissal of the charges, once she and her lawyer made it clear that they weren’t interested in a plea, but her complete and total exoneration; and, last weekend, the reinstatement of the charges against her. I could get into the data practices requests I’ve been making, and Bill Palmer’s unlawful demand for money before he started to do his job. I could get into the connection to http://gangstrikefarce.com, and how I told Jesse Garcia of the Minneapolis Police Department that I had been working on a book on that, before I ran into a much, much bigger story.

But I’ll save that for another time, and just point whoever’s interested to http://familymatterii.com. There’s a lot going on. Leave it at that, for now.

In order to understand the crimes that Bill Palmer committed—that’s crimes, plural—you have to know a little law, both in statute, and in practice.

[Continued after the jump]

In theory, Bill Palmer did not assault me. In practice, he did: it’s commonplace for a civilian to so much as lightly touched a cop being charged with assault. In some states—not this one—and un-authorized and nonconsensual touch is, in fact, assault. And, despite the common belief of the worst of the badged set that they are ubermenschen, they aren’t; what’s sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander.

What happens here works like this:

Civilian touches badged guy who doesn’t want hin to. He is arrested for assault, and, often, resisting arrest. He may or may not be jumped and thumped in the process. He is then hauled off to jail, and sooner or later, offered a plea bargain; typically, because this usually happens to indigent people, his overworked and spiritually broken Public Defender recommends that he takes the bargain.

So the question of whether or not the unwarranted touching is actually an assault never makes it to court. The perp just pleads out on a disorderly, and it’s all over.

But the crimes that Bill Palmer committed—not all of which appear in the video—are much more serious than a simple assault. Which is why I’ve been careful to talk about “assault and other crimes” throughout this.

One more preparatory note: I don’t think Bill Palmer is an evil guy. He thinks with his badge more than his brain, but that’s not uncommon. I’m not going to go into his public history at this point in any detail, but my strong opinion is that he’s got too much blood on his hands to be able to function as a police officer. That’s why, I believe, he was taken off the street and given a desk job. But I could be wrong. I think he ought not be a police officer, and is simply too damaged to be allowed to carry the combination of a gun and badge. I don’t know that he hears the screams of the woman he killed in the middle of the night, but I wouldn’t be surprised. And that’s not his only kill.

In order to understand the crimes that you see on the video, you have to listen to the audio, as well as the video.

The “crime” I supposedly committed — the one that Palmer has falsely accused me of committing — is a felony. Let’s look at the statute.

Minnesota Statute 609.66 Subd. 1g says, in relevant part (look up the whole thing yourself. Don’t take my word for it):

A person who commits either of the following acts is guilty of a felony and may be sentenced to imprisonment for not more than five years . . .

1. Possesses a dangerous weapon, ammunition, or explosives within any courthouse complex.

Wow. That’s clear. I was carrying in City Hall; the judge says that Minneapolis City Hall is a courthouse complex. I should be convicted, easily, and sentenced to five years. After all, both guns I had on me, and all of the knives, are “dangerous weapons,” and the guns contained ammunition.

So why didn’t poor Bill Palmer arrest felonious me? Does he so love me that he refused to do his duty and arrest this heavily-armed felon?

Nah. Read on:

this subdivision does not apply to:

(1) licensed peace officers or military personnel who are performing official duties;

(2) persons who carry pistols according to the terms of a permit issued under section 624.714 and who so notify the sheriff or the commissioner of public safety, as appropriate;

Hi. My name’s Joel. I have such a permit, and I’ve repeatedly notified the Hennepin County Sheriff — the office, as well as the guy who holds it — most recently last month. (The only time I notified Sheriff Stanek personally was last year, when I came to his office — in Minneapolis City Hall — for a cup of coffee and a chat on other matters. But I’ve notified his office repeatedly.)

But wait, there’s more! Not only am I not guilty by reason of notification, but I’m not guilty by reason of permission.

Read on; even if I wasn’t a permit holder, I still wouldn’t be a felon because of the following:

(4) persons who possess dangerous weapons in a courthouse complex with the express consent of the county sheriff or who possess dangerous weapons in a state building with the express consent of the commissioner of public safety.

I got that, too. Last month. (The express consent was through two of his sergeants; Sheriff Stanek, not being in his office at the time, wasn’t available to give it himself.)

So that’s why Bill Palmer didn’t arrest me. He knows all of that, and he didn’t dare falsely arrest me for a felony, as that would cost his department a whole lot of money.

Monday, we’ll look at the “judge’s order” that Bill kept blabbering about.

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Tune in Monday on Shot In The Dark.