Governor Dayton: “Where’s the $#&@#@% Remote Control?”

A Dayton Governorship is a distant second to an Emmer Governorship as a Minnesotan but for a conservative blogger, a hell of a lot more fun. Four years of job security!

(right Mitch? …Mitch?)

Dayton is (along with his buck-toothed sister the Star Tribune) going to be awesome blogfodder!

Consider this for example:

said his first priority now will be to improve the economy and add jobs.

Improve the economy? That’s like improving the weather? How does a governor improve the economy? The “economy” is a symptom, a result. Okay, so it’s a nit, but nonetheless an apropos observation of a nit wit. Let the befuddlement begin.

…and here comes his buck-toothed sister:

Those actions complete a stunning resurrection for Dayton, a one-term U.S. senator, who now will become the first Democratic governor in Minnesota in two decades.

A stunning…less than half percent…resurrection? …certainly not the high praise it was intended to be considering the status one must occupy from which to be resurrected, yes?

Methinks had the election been held one or two days later we’d be celebrating Governor Emmer, which is to say Mark Dayton is a beneficiary of chance.

…back to the Strib:

He said he would work with the business sector, which largely opposed his candidacy, to improve the state’s economy and job opportunities.

Nice gesture but that’s okay, Mark. We didn’t need you then and we don’t need you now. I’m sure we can wait four years – in the mean time, if you could just sort of stay out of the way, that’d be best.

Make sure you have a comfy couch and a big screen TV in the mansion (sorry if it’s smaller than the one you grew up in) so you can be comfortable in your sweats while the legislature conducts the business of the state.

But be prepared!

They might need you to sign something, cut a ribbon, or make an appearance from time to time (no talking please – just smile) – so keep one shirt and one suit coat pressed at all times!

Night-night now little Marky. Take your meds and go to sleep. We’ll wake you when we need you.

7 thoughts on “Governor Dayton: “Where’s the $#&@#@% Remote Control?”

  1. I liked the bit about how he “reached across the aisle” to ask the GOP for help balancing the budget. I can hear the response; spending cuts coming right up, Mark!

  2. In short order Mad Mark will be hearing this little dity playing over and over in his head:

    “One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do”

  3. There’s a world where I can go
    and tell my secrets to
    In my room
    In my room

    In this world I lock out
    all my worries and my fears
    In my room
    In my room

    Do my dreaming and my scheming lie awake and pray
    Do my crying and my sighing laugh at yesterday

    Now it’s dark and I’m alone
    but I won’t be afraid
    In my room
    In my room

  4. I was out and about yesterday, so purchased a Mpls Star-Tribune to read about the new Gopher football coach (who by the way, has to be a Republican with his life long work ethic). But read the A section also, including the editorial page. Yes, I regret the 50 cents I spent.

  5. “I can hear the response; spending cuts coming right up, Mark!”

    Not with Abler chairing HHS Bubbasan.

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