“This meeting of the State Committee for National Security will come to order. First item of business, a report on biological warfare research. Minister? Minister? Uh, does anybody know where the Minister is?”
“Excuse me, sir. I’m from that department.”
“Who are you?”
“I’m the Assistant to the Junior Deputy’s Secretary.”
“Where’s everybody else?”
“Dead, sir. Or missing.”
“WHAT? What’s going on in your department?”
“Well, sir, we used gene splicing to engineer a virus targeted at a specific racial group and the lab tests went so well that we needed a larger scale test. The plan was to release the virus in an enemy city but the scientist carrying the vial got car-jacked and the vial shattered.”
“Has the population been quarantined so they don’t spread it?”
“Too late for that, sir. Most of the infected fled the city before the quarantine was announced. They’re currently spreading the virus around the globe.”
“How bad is it?”
“Well, sir, that depends on who you ask. Our official press releases claim the virus is less deadly than influenza, hardly anybody is infected and practically nobody has died.”
“Well, that’s a relief.”
“Yes, sir, that’s why we said it. The truth is we have no idea how many people are infected and no treatment for those who are. Millions could die.”
“Excuse me, I’m sorry to interrupt, Mr. Chairman, I just have to ask this young man: Are You Insane? Did you actually attempt to genetically engineer a virus to target a race?”
“Yes, we did. Why?”
“Because race is merely a social construct. There’s no such thing as race. We’re All Going to Die!”
“In that case, sir, motion to adjourn.”
Joe Doakes
And SCENE
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