Suggestions Sought?
By Mitch Berg
A co-worker is leaving the office to take a new job. We’re all supposed to sign the card. I have trouble with them. I overthink the message to make sure it’s politically correct and inoffensive, yet sincere and heartfelt.
First I tried “I’m happy you’re leaving,” but maybe that should be re-written as “I’m happy you’re leaving the office to start a new career.” Maybe not.
I thought about “Good luck in your new job,” but that sounds like the implication is “you’re going to need it.”
The problem is, I’m a poor liar. I hate to say “I’m going to miss you,” when I’m not. I hate to say “you deserve it,” when you don’t.
Is there a training class for this? How to be more sincere liar? Where do the politicians get their lessons?
Joe doakes
Have at it, mind hive.
August 9th, 2019 at 5:15 am
Sign your name next to that of the office’s biggest suck-up, then draw an arrow pointing to that name and write, “What they said.”
DO NOT WRITE “what he said” or “what she said”. We must be careful with pronouns.
August 9th, 2019 at 6:02 am
Just sign your name.
My deepest sympathies for having to work in a place where you have to waste time thinking about this.
August 9th, 2019 at 6:16 am
Per Greg, what jdm said.
August 9th, 2019 at 6:25 am
A favorite I’ve used is
“You’re long overdue for this opportunity!”
alternated with
“You’ve earned this opportunity!”
August 9th, 2019 at 9:12 am
You could go with “thoughts and prayers.”
Maybe it’s better to just say, “Best wishes.”
August 9th, 2019 at 9:17 am
If you think you must do more than just your name, go with Best Wishes.
August 9th, 2019 at 10:03 am
If this is the kind of issues you need to worry about at your job, my best advice would be to immediately start making the necessary arrangements for them to be giving *you* a bon voyage card.
Life is way to short for this kind of stuff.
August 9th, 2019 at 10:24 am
“Next Year In Jerusalem!”
Waddya think? Too Jewish?
August 9th, 2019 at 12:38 pm
You dont want my suggestions on this… just trust me.
August 9th, 2019 at 2:30 pm
One time I started a new job in the morning, and at noon there was a going away lunch for someone who was leaving the company. The card landed on my new desk at 11. I double-checked the spelling of the woman’s name, wrote it on the card, and added the following message: “I feel as if I’ve known you for hours. Best wishes!”