Proud To Be An American
My Northern Alliance colleague JB Doubtless, in quoting a song by country/pop duo Big and Rich, says that conservatives should be listening to Country/Western music.
Well, what would I know - I only worked at three c&w stations over the years, including a brief stint as a Music Director of sorts. I learned to like plenty of C&W, and ignore the rest.
Just as I do every other genre of music, from classical to techno.
But, driven by JB's challenge, I figured it was time to revisit the message of country western; JB has thrown the gauntlet, forthrightly decrying the anti-American messages he sees in popular/rock and roll music (and in movies, on TV, and on ingredient lists in cookbooks as far as I can tell), so I figured it was only fair that I rise to the challenge.
Since Messrs. Big and Rich responsed to a market demand by putting the de rigeur paeon to US troops on their latest album, they seemed to be a good place to start. I opted to begin by examining the messages - fully liminal ones, mind you - in their 2004 classic "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy".
Waiting to have my patriotism affirmed, I began listening and reading.
The song begins:
Well, I walk into the room
Passing out hundred dollar bills
And it kills and it thrills like the horns on my Silverado grill
Whoah, nellie.
Now, I grew up in North Dakota, around the line where Wheat Country turns into Cattle Country. I knew a fair number of real cowboys in my day; one of my pals as a child spent some years in the pro rodeo circuit; one of my best friends from high school lived on a ranch. Tossing hunnibears around and driving around in a $40K pickup with tasteless grill ornaments would have been anathema to any real cowboy I ever met, who were if anything the most all-business people I ever met in my life.
But who does that sound like? Messrs. Big and Rich sound a lot more like Old Dirty Bastard and his posse; I don't know about you, but I'm more likely to link profligacy, tastelessness (embodied in a worship of "bling", of which horns on the grill of a Silverado is certainly a country-fried cousin) and other such behavior with a hip-hop artist, or some tastless seventies British glam-rock star, than anything any real middle-American would recognize.
Onward:
And I buy the bar a double round of crown
And everybody's getting down Drunkenness, and the inability to really enjoy life without a huge buzz on. Sounds more Russian than American to me - Ed.
An' this town ain't never gonna be the same.
(Chorus:)
Cause I saddle up my horse
and I ride into the city
I make a lot of noise
Cause the girls
They are so pretty
Riding up and down Broadway
on my old stud Leroy
And the girls say
Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
Everybody says
Save a horse, Ride a cowboy
So in a drunken stupor, our Hip-Hop emulating, Communist-sympathizing "cowboy" opts to ride a horse into town. If there's any tackier, more self-absorbed display of enviro-wackoism than a smoke-belching Subaru plastered with "Greenpeace" stickers, it's a drunken, cash-flinging fop holding up traffic as he meanders down the arterial on a fly-eaten, horsesh*t-spewing nag, oblivious to the world; in fact, the casual disregard for the traffic hazard bespeaks a self-absorption worthy of an anti-smoking activist.
Well I don't give a dang about nothing
See? Totally self-absorbed - with the nihilistic
brio of a Macalester anthropology undergrad.
And as to the whole injunction to "ride a cowboy" - well, it's either a paeon to mass transit, or a call to mindless promiscuity, neither of which should be acceptable to real conservatives.
I'm singing and Bling- Blanging
While the girls are drinking
Long necks down! More glorification of substance abuse; Messrs. Big and Rich may as well be Jimi Hendrix at this point - Ed
And I wouldn't trade ol' Leroy
or my Chevrolet for your Escalade (Nor could they, the way they throw their money around. Not that such lushes should be allowed to drive anyway. Is this the best America has to offer? - Ed.))
Or your freak parade
Uh-huh. A guy who throws around hundreds and rides a horse through town, presumably slurring and barfing all the way, is calling
whom a freak?
I'm the only John Wayne left in this town
Riiiight. The Duke - Mr. All-American - wouldn't wipe an ostentatious, hip-hop impersonating, drunken lout like this off of his boots.
(Spoken:)
I'm a thourough-bred
that's what she said
in the back of my truck bed (Could he be encouraging mindless promiscuity? He's no better than Hollywood!)
As I was gettin' buzzed on suds (More alcoholism!)
Out on some back country road.
We where flying high (Now with the drug abuse? Country Western my foot - this is more like Jefferson Airplane circa 1969! A few more years of this "pro-American" fare and the terrorist might just decide we've had enough; destroying us would be redundant, we'll have all turned into the drunken, money-whoring, syphilitic wretches they already think we are!))
Fining, whine, having ourselves a good and rich time
And I was going, just about as far as she'd let me go.
But her evaluation
of my cowboy reputation ("Hey, Trisha - I'm going to score with that drunk, broke guy in the back of a pickup truck!")
Had me begging for salvation
all night long
So I took her out kicking frogs (All this, and mindless cruelty too? If I were a drunk pseudo-conservative chick, I'd do him!
Introduced her to my old bird dog
And sang her every Wilie Nelson song I could think of
And we made love
So let's run down the list: the morals and ethics of the Wu-Tang Crew via John Bonham; life displayed as a delusional, dissipate, drunken orgy.
Yeah. I'm proud to be an American.
Better that your kids listen to the Sex Pistols, I think. At least the lousy moral lessons were displayed as lousy moral lessons ("Jenny" from Birmingham, in the song "Bodies", at least saw some consequences for her debauchery. I'm guessing Messrs. Big and Rich are too drunk to even wear a friggin' condom, much less give a rat's ass about the illegitimacy that their glorification of drunken fornication promotes).
Should conservatives listen to this entitlement-mongering, morally-depraved buncombe, much less exalt it as a role model for the good conservative life?
"Well, Jeannie Sue got pregnant by some drunken, horse-riding lout after a Big and Rich concert - but at least they support the troops!" Sorry, JB. Swing and a miss.
Maybe I'll make it a feature; "Morally-depraved Country Song of the Week".
I could be doing it a long time.
Posted by Mitch at
November 19, 2005 05:08 PM
| TrackBack
That's all you're worked up about?
We thought you'd be more upset about that guy who shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.
cp
Posted by: cleversponge at November 19, 2005 06:55 PMFirst things, sponge: I'm never "worked up" over any of this stuff.
Second: Read Fraters.
Posted by: mitch at November 19, 2005 07:04 PMwe're kidding. we're quite dry sometimes.
do we really have to read fraters? ok, hold on...
ok, that was just stupid. country used to be working peoples music; you worked hard and loved your country. now, stuff like big n rich is just a bunch of flavored pop.
even the song that he uses as an example is a hollow cliche. after born in the usa, springsteen started to round his characters out; the ghost of tom joad is a good example of this. big n rich...they may as well be singing about apple pie. never mind the fact they rip off johnny cash's drive on for the key line...
big n' rich:
He limps when he walks
But he's strong when he talks
cash:
now i got a little limp when i walk
i got a little tremolo when i talk
drive on is the better song by a mile.
anywho, country and pop have been doing war songs for decades. the good populist ones (whether for the war or against it) have always placed the focus on the damage done to the man doing the fighting rather than the fighting itself.
eagles, apple pie...all that bullshit is for people who aint ever been there. real musical war characters go home and deal with the mess of a family left behind, struggle with morality, etc, etc. for instance, did that bomb i just targeted down on that building kill someone who didn't deserve it? you know, stuff to drink about.
a good war song has nothing to do with politics. it is all about men dealing with themselves, their family and their country after they get back. folks are different when they come back. yes, their service is patriotic...but that's the easy pop song. the good ones go deeper.
of course...we generalize a bit. we like big n' rich and we're country fools...even the modern bullshit.
btw...fraters also had a post about johnny cash. he was looking for someone who didn't like johnny. fyi, mr sponge's entire oklahoma inlaw clan HATES mr cash. as for the movie...it's ok. mr. sponge is quite the cash fan. we were a little disappointed. while jauquin (sp) does a credible impression...there's something not quite right about his voice. we know the prison albums (san quentin, folsom) by heart. he doesn't quite get it...it's good kereoke, but not quite there.
cp
Posted by: cleversponge at November 19, 2005 07:53 PMcleversponge sounds about right re war songs...good post altogether.
Posted by: Colleen at November 19, 2005 10:24 PMMitch,
As soon as you can point out the patriotic Bruce Sprinsteen song(s) that he has written that come within even a mile of what BNR displayed in the 8th of November, I will shut up.
Until then, you are (as usual) full of crap.
Your prevarications know no bounds.
It's kind of turning into a daily ritual for me: let's see what Mitch is bullshitting about today.
Oh, today he lives in an urban wonderland. Tomorrow he will chase gang members off by the sheer force of his North Dakotan will.
Enough with the puffery Mitch, we can see through it.
Just because your little minions defend you don't mean jack. For every Bogus Doug or other sycophant there is a 100 conservatives (or I guess libs) who are yelling "This guy is full of beans!"
And it's really enough of the trying to get laid through your blog thing by trying to impress chicks with your playing of 349 instruments, your knowledge of Korean restaurants or whatever pedantic krep you are throwing our way on that particular day. Please. Seriously. I suggest turning the blog into a Capn Ed style-regurgitated commentary blog based on what is on the Drudge Report.
You can tell us about the Mullahs and the threat they pose and other such High Minded abstractions.
The jig is up dude.
Posted by: jb at November 20, 2005 01:01 AMIt must be dismaying for a hardline absolutist like JB to survey the marquee at the local multiplex this weekend. That heathen Harry Potter's casting his secular spell of Filthymus Lucres o'er all the screens.
But good news! I hear "Burrito: Omega Code 3-D" is making its direct-to-DVD debut soon.
Posted by: Ernst Stavro Blofeld at November 20, 2005 03:12 AMjb is often right in so many ways!
Posted by: Colleen at November 20, 2005 08:20 AMFor starts, JB - relax. Take a joke. Life is better when your teeth aren't always clenched.
"As soon as you can point out the patriotic Bruce Sprinsteen song(s) that he has written that come within even a mile of what BNR displayed in the 8th of November, I will shut up."
For starters: Irrelevant. Show me a Beethoven or a Duke Ellington or a Louis Armstrong song that wraps itself in the American flag, while you're at it. Does that invalidate them? You want to focus on "patriotism" (if wrapping up market-driven, canned song about soldiers qualifies), and block out all the corrosive influences in your pet genre. Can't have it both ways!
Secondly - I love the double standard you show, JB. You say you "like" music like "Afternoon Delight" - done by a couple of genuine vietnam-protesting yippies, Bill Danoff and Taffy Nivert - and ABBA, which was a bunch of Swedish limo socialists; but you plead "it's only entertainment". But when I say some type of music entertains me, reaches me in some way that I enjoy, then you suddenly have to pull your obnoxious (and selective, snide and insulting!) little political filter out and wave it around.
Third: "Into The Fire", Springsteen's tribute to the FDNY. Better than anything you can name. Period.
"Until then, you are (as usual) full of crap."
Mommy?
"Your prevarications know no bounds."
It's not a "prevarication" JB - and if you're going to go and rip on people for acting like they have an education (the same one you do) and putting on like some sort of pseudo-redneck (pink-neck?) even though you're a college-educated yuppie, then at least use one-syllable words like "lie". Which I'm not, since opinion about art is inherently subjective; one can not "prevaricate" or lie about it, no matter how hard one tries.
"It's kind of turning into a daily ritual for me: let's see what Mitch is bullshitting about today."
Then I'd say, JB, your priorities are very out of whack.
"Oh, today he lives in an urban wonderland. Tomorrow he will chase gang members off by the sheer force of his North Dakotan will."
So was it at Catholic school that you learned to argue exclusively via strawmen?
"Enough with the puffery Mitch, we can see through it. "
Jeez, JB. Don't have a stroke.
"Just because your little minions defend you don't mean jack. For every Bogus Doug or other sycophant there is a 100 conservatives (or I guess libs) who are yelling "This guy is full of beans!"
Send names and phone numbers. Make sure you tell them it's to support your little tantrum over something that matters in the long run not a jot.
"And it's really enough of the trying to get laid through your blog thing"
Dude. Pay attention. I do RADIO for sex. I do blogs for money.
" by trying to impress chicks with your playing of 349 instruments"
Ten of 'em. Pedal steel is next.
" your knowledge of Korean restaurants or whatever pedantic krep you are throwing our way on that particular day."
If someone pretended to have a brain and more than two interests in the forest, and JB wasn't there, would it still be pedantic "krep".
"Please. Seriously. I suggest turning the blog into a Capn Ed style-regurgitated commentary blog based on what is on the Drudge Report."
Been there, done that.
"You can tell us about the Mullahs and the threat they pose and other such High Minded abstractions."
Mkay. Duly noted.
"The jig is up dude."
The "Jig" is "up?" That implies some sort of end state, some kind of consequence for some action that's taken place now or in the past. Do you know something I don't? (Obviously not when it comes to music, but I mean in general)?
I repeat, JB: Relax. Don't take yourself so seriously. God knows I don't.
(Take myself seriously, I mean. Or you. Either of us. Everything in this life is rented, bigfella. Your blood pressure must be out of this friggin' world).
Posted by: mitch at November 20, 2005 11:19 AMColleen, JB's an adolescent little prick who was probably never told he wasn't the center of the universe. And the things he's right about, are usually things every other conservative was right about long before him.
Posted by: AK at November 20, 2005 09:34 PMMan alive. I don't know why jb can't "be right" about something if someone else has been right long before him...that would seem to be the case for almost everyone's opinions. I find it a little funny that because of a lack of regard for Springsteen's music (and yes, a self-righteousness that is apparent in most other posters as well when it comes to stating a deeply-held opinion) he shold be singled out for such approbation. Plus, I think he IS right for the most part....that might be why I have never thought of him as either adolescent (and there's plenty of that around here at times) or a prick (and even more of that)...but then again, people might not like me any more than him. Some people don't state or hold opinions to win a popularity contest. He wasn't always so peevish..he became that way after constant nit-picking and hammering on his opinions from "his betters"...
Posted by: Colleen at November 20, 2005 09:55 PMWhy anyone would admire and line the pockets of a socialist or "artist(s)" that hold their (hopefully) deeply-held beliefs in scorn is beyond me (and jb).
"Tossing hunnibears around and driving around in a $40K pickup with tasteless grill ornaments would have been anathema to any real cowboy I ever met...."
Sorry, I'd have to disagree here. It's not a lack of willingness, it's a lack of money. (My dad and one of my uncles were on the pro-rodeo circuit and said uncle was/is later a large-animal vet.) There is a large segment of that population that lives for the raucous, beer-soaked party and shiny, new duallies.
That said, unless you look to songs for lifestyle advice, I'm afraid I don't understand JB's vehemence. FWIW, my taste is rather different than either JB's or Mitch's, but I don't assume either is "wrong" as a result. JB likes country because he likes the message of a part of it? OK, whatever, I pick some songs that way too. He thinks it wrong to listen to songs or artists not on his approved list? How quaint.
Posted by: Doug Sundseth at November 20, 2005 10:03 PMJust had a road trip through Iowa. On long drives I usually search for country stations. At least there you can generally find listenable melodies beneath the twang, and the occasional truly great song. Until now. There seems to have been some unholy melding of country and hip hop that is quite possibly the most puke inducing music ever recorded. Big & Rich are at the forefront of this aural assault. Mitch did better than I could have done in deconstructing this crap -- after a few seconds I started bleeding out my ears and had to change the station.
Posted by: chriss at November 20, 2005 10:36 PMI have a strong feeling that Americans should Support American Interests ONLY. Any country we help should be as a result of their interests corresponding to our interests.
Whether allying ourselves with Israel is in our National interest is up for legitimate debate it bothers me that a Radio Talk Show host in this area is going to be getting a "Friend of Israel" award.
I would be bothered regardless of what country, be it a "Friend of Great Britain award" or whatever. Again, in foreign policy Americans should support what is in America's National interests, and everything should flow from that. Which means that if it is in America's interest to support Israel, then I am all for it, BUT if it isn't in America's interests, then I am willing to accept that as well.
But by accepting this "Friend of Israel" award, it means that this talk show host supports Israel regardless of whether it is in our national interest or not. He is looking at it fromt he wrong direction. He is looking at it from the perspective of "a friend of Israel", not from the perspective of supporting America's interests and helping other countries only if it serves America's best interests.
Kirby Wilbur kwilbur@fisherradio.com should be ashamed to accept the "American Jewish Congress Friend Of Israel Award" for it just says that he puts the interests of a foreign country ahead of America.
Look, I criticize naturalized citizens for doing this when it is them putting the interests of the country they came from ahead of that of their new country, America. Can I do any less for someone who was born and grew up in this country?
http://www.kvi.com/x9979.xml
Posted by: Steve at November 20, 2005 10:56 PMThis isn't the only C&W song that has a mixed message...
http://greenflowerstreet.blogspot.com/2005/05/tales-from-nashville-police-blotter.html
Posted by: Just Me at November 21, 2005 07:44 AMIt isn't kicking frogs, it is "gigging frogs" (Whatever that means).
Posted by: Loren at November 21, 2005 11:35 AMI kinda had an idea who these guys are, I guess (second coming of Brooks & Dunn with some rap thrown in, maybe?), but I had never heard one of their "songs" (still haven't) or read their lyrics. Pretty much reaffirms my belief that what used to be called country music is now called "Americana", and what is now called "country music" is just "follow the money."
My John Madden moment: "There sure are a lot of stupid people out there."
Hummmm, maybe I should ship these boys a copy of Scott Miller and the Commonwealth's "Thus Always to Tyrants".
Posted by: jackscrow at November 21, 2005 11:50 AMIts an uphill battle trying to defend Big & Rich, or as I like to call them Suck & Sh...
Strip away all the hype, and the fancy marketing, and what do you have? Nothing. They are a product of the 21st century C & W morph into pop, ala Kenny Chesney, Shania Twain, et al, (except that I CAN stand to listen to ST on the radio - she does have a good singing voice and listenable song lyrics and melodies.... not so with Big OR Rich).
I assume whatever popularity BNR has, is tied to the currently trendy younger "cowboy wannabes" who think the word 'cowboy' sounds cool, but know nothing about the lifestyle. And maybe they like the concept portrayed in the C & W videos (can you imagine the term 'C & W videos' even existing 20 years ago?), such as in "Save a Horse":
- scantilly clad, easy hotties
- living large in the pimpmobile (BTW I believe its an El Dorado in the video, not Silverado - at least a pickup would've give BNR some cred)
- the endless flow of good times via alcohol
To me, the measure of a group is: if your only exposure to them was hearing them on the radio, would you still like them? i.e no vides, no hype, no front page media blitzes, no award shows, etc. Who could say, without these things, they'd still like B N R?
I can say I'd still like musiciaons like Toby Kieth, BB King, U2, ACab Caloway, persones across many music genres.
Posted by: guy at November 21, 2005 01:13 PMMitch,
I will pay you 100 dollars to play one song, in tune on the pedal steel.
Just let me know where and when.
Posted by: JB Doubtless at November 22, 2005 12:14 PMJB,
Since you didn't place a time limit, and I think I was fairly clear that I haven't even begun to learn the pedal steel yet (it's "Next", not part of my current ten), I will exploit the open-endedness of your challenge. Meet me at my place on November 23, 2010. Remember my 100 samolians. Oh, and I call "Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald".
Do you, by chance, play pedal steel? I'm pretty good on straight slide, but pedal steel, as you no doubt know, is a doozy.
And in the ecumenical spirit of the season, I will pay you $100 to play a tune, in tune, on the cello (Any recognizable etude will do) or bagpipes (how about "A Man's A Man For A' That"? I'm in a Bobby Burns kinda mood). By the end of the year, natch - it is best to learn from the mistakes of others.
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