Ironies of the Reformation

Martin Luther, John Knox and Jean Calvin, March 17, at the end of the Reformation. They have happened into a Saint Patrick's Celebration to relax.

LUTHER: "Yo, it's Saint Paddy's day!"

KNOX: "Aw, maaan - after a hundred years of war, I could use a corned beef sandwich, yo!

CALVIN: Nay, while verily fuch a fandwich would not be an unfeemly pleasure, we doth not have a dispensation from our prieft...

LUTHER: "Yo, you predestinarian numbn*ts, we don't recognize priestly dispensations!

KNOX: "No kidding, dork".

LUTHER: "Sarah! I'll have a Guinny and a Corned Beef"

KNOX: "Same, but make mine a Newcastle".

CALVIN: "What is thy least pleasureable brew?"

SARAH THE WAITRESS: "Probably Stella Artois..."

CALVIN: "Then hie thee forth and bring me fuch a beer. Indeed, be it fuch a travail, bring me two, the better to double my fuffering. And a corned beef fandwich..."

KNOX (Sotto voce, to Luther): "Why does he put "f" in place of the first "s" in any word?"

LUTHER (Sotto Voce to Knox): "Don't get him started..."

MARTY NEWTON: "Here's yer corned beef and beer, gentlemen".

ALL THREE: "Yea, verily!"

(All three reformation leaders pick up their corned beef fandwiches and take a big bite...)

(...and hold their sandwiches, awkwardly...)

KNOX: "This really sucks".

LUTHER (distasteful look on face): "Oh, father, why hast thou forsaken us?"

KNOX: "It tastes like salted phlegm!"

CALVIN (smacking lips in glee): "The fuffering be extreme!"

KNOX: "Sarah? Could I toss this and get a Sish and Chipf?"

Posted by Mitch at March 14, 2006 06:30 AM | TrackBack