Air America Pundits: Your Show Prep Is Here

Guys and gals: I know how hard show prep can be. I'm a sympathetic, compassionate guy who's been in your shoes. Hey, a two hour show takes a lot of prep. You need shortcuts.

I'm here to help.

• Jimmy Carter was an ineffectual simp of a president who actively sought Soviet collusion in the 1980 election, and has spent 2.5 decades cozying up to tyrants the world over. Most of subsaharan Africa is still reeling from the neo-marxist governments that he unwittingly enabled to sweep the place during his adminstraiton. He should be ostracized by American culture. By my calculation, he needs to build about four million Habitat For Humanity homes to expiate his guilt for his stupidity during and after his admistration. Got nails?
• The Star/Tribune may not be wholly-owned subsidiary of the DFL, but then you'd never really know.
• I'd like to bring back the moderate Minnesota "republicans" of the sixties through the late eighties, too - so I could pelt their whiny, tax-raising, DFL-appeasing mugs with snowballs. I'd haul them into the capitol restroom and give them swirlies until they retroactively joined the DFL. They played a dismal role in contributing to Minnesota's culture of institutional entitlement, and the sick, Stockholm-like syndrome it foisted on our media which constantly pines for the phony, dysfunctional tranquility of that era. Minnesota was tranquil back then - it was the tranquility of the feed lot.
• The Taxpayers League are the real humanitarians.
• If we made handgun ownership mandatory for all law-abiding citizens, Minnesota would be a better place nearly instantly.
• The newspaper columnist is the dodo bird of the 2020s.
• By 2040, people will look back on institutions like the Strib with the same disbelieving disdain that they currently reserve for the HUAC.