All In The Timing

SCENE:  Mitch BERG is rigging a small “Snark”-class sailboat out for a day of sailing on Lake Minnetonka.  Among the modifications: the stepping of fore and mizzen masts, and the conversion of all three to square rigging, and a black with white-stripe and black “gunports” paint job, to convert the 14 foot boat into a small model of the USS Constitution. 

BERG notices Avery LIBRELLE paddling past on a recumbent bicycle that’s had two outrigger floats attached to the frame, and paddles clipped to the drive wheel, making the recumbant into a crude pedal-powered catamaran. 

LIBRELLE notices BERG before he can duck below the gunwales of the small boat.

LIBRELLE:   Ahoy, Merg!

BERG:  Er, ahoy, matey.  Interesting ride.

LIBRELLE:  Yeah, I paid for it with a government “green energy” grant.

BERG:  Of course you did.  What’s up?

LIBRELLE:  I’m on my way to a float-in observing the 44th anniversary of the Kent State shootings.

BERG:  Huh.  44 years.  Wow.  I remember seeing that on the TV when I was a little kid.

LIBRELLE:  Further proof that we the Masses need to be on guard against totalitarian rule!

BERG:  Huh?

LIBRELLE: Nixon ordered those murders!

BERG: Er, it was more a matter of National Guardsmen panicking under pressure.  There was no conspiracy – at least, none that 44 years of constant scrutiny has found.

LIBRELLE:  Only if you believe the conservative mainstream media.

BERG:  Er, right.  So speaking of coverups, how about Benghazi?

LIBRELLE:  Oh, stop. That was two whole years ago!

LIBRELLE pedals briskly away – running up onto a sandbar.  



10 thoughts on “All In The Timing

  1. As most SITDers know, Kent state was much more complex than the left likes to tell us. Just a couple of quick notes:
    -Leftwingers firebombed small businesses in the downtiown area that week
    -Attacked firefighters who were trying to put out a fire in a building that was started on fire
    -Rumours were going around that domestic terrorists were in town and planning attacks of some king

  2. chuck, exactly!
    and we can thank the always execrable Neil Young for writing “Ohio” and then providing the world his whinging rendition of same.

  3. I’m building a pedal powered submarine with which I shall patrol urban lakes in search of moonbat powered watercraft of all types. Then I shall sink them with renewable, environmentally friendly torpedo’s.

  4. swiftee, disguise the periscope to look like a loon, they’ll never suspect their totem bird of betrayal.

  5. Swiftee – I suggest that your motto be “Remember the Hunley.”
    ( ).

    Kent State’s five-year anniversary was being commemorated at my school during my junior year of college. Three friends and I submitted a counterpointed letter to the editor of The Statesman, the school’s newspaper, assigning blame to the protesters and the involved casualties – I believe there was a passerby or two hit; not sure of that.

    The letter actually got published in the next issue and pretty much passed unnoticed. I still have a copy somewhere. I can’t imagine what would happen today if a couple of knuckleheads like we were at the tried that.

  6. Two of the dead were protesters; the other two were passersby, including one who’d been an ROTC member.

  7. I don’t blame the shooting victims, even if they were protestors. Just want to put everything in context. There were violent people in that town who had already commited attacks.

  8. Great idea Joe.

    In fact, if I fly the CSA Naval ensign, I’ll get a double bonus…it’ll enrage the sinking moonbats and I can ask my neighbors to chip in on construction costs.

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