If you follow the “logic” behind Andy Birkey’s piece (and like all lefty memes, it came from Birkey’s superiors; Phyllis Kahn was mumbling the same sort of tripe a few weeks ago), that…:

If you have even been divorced – in other words, if some part of your life or paper trail is inconsistent with the position, Then you have no business debating what “marriage” is…

…then consistency more or less demands you apply that same logic throughout.

  • If you, for any reason, didn’t get a 4.0 average in high school, Then you should recuse yourself from discussion about improving academic performance.  After all, you must have exhibited perfection in the past for your opinion to count!
  • If you had an abortion, for whatever reason, Then you should not be debating abortion.  Who needs people who’ve made mistakes deciding policy, right?
  • If you’re over the age of 28 and don’t have kids, Then you should have nothing to do with any issue involving children.  All you “child-free” people are always such experts.
  • If you are, for whatever reason, not earning over $150,000 a year, Then you should be barred from discussions about taxing the “rich”.
  • If you ever got a traffic ticket, Then you should be barred from legislating on transportation. Perfection, people!
  • If you, for any reason, have ever had any run-in with any law over any issue, Then you shouldn’t be making laws.  Remember – Andy Birkey and Phyllis Kahn have demanded perfection fron all of…you.
  • If you live in a city that gets local government aid, Then you should shut up about LGA. Giving residents of LGA-receiving cities a legislative voice is like allowing inmates to ask for cell keys.
  • If you write for a Soros-funded publication, Then you shouldn’t refer to other peoples’ “zealotry”…oh, wait.  That one isn’t satire.
  • If you are not a businessperson, Then you should not discuss business taxes or job creation.
  • If you are a public employee union member, Then you should never, never voice an opinion on public policy that affects entrepreneurship.

Don’t look at me.  It’s Phyllis Kahn and Andy Birkey’s idea.

7 thoughts on “If/Then

  1. If you have even been divorced – in other words, if some part of your life or paper trail is inconsistent with the position, Then you have no business debating what “marriage” is

    By that same logic there are precious few gays who’ve ever been married, so they have no business debating what marriage should be.

  2. If you’ve ever driven a car Thenyou should shut up about gas taxes. Ditto riding a public bus. Shut up about light rail.

  3. Oooh ohh! I’ve got another fallacy!

    Arcumentum ad Populum:

    * Most people approve of [proposition]
    * Therefore, [proposition] is true/correct/moral etc.


    “Because it seems a majority of Americans are not homophobes, and DO favor same sex marriage on an equal basis with heterosexual marriage.”

    Of course, the argument takes a double-hit of underlying facts are wrong also.

  4. Oh yeah, all over the country you see gay marriage advocates struggling to get SSM on the ballot and keep it out of the courts . . .

  5. I’ve got another one;

    If you claim to be a journalist and all you can write about are the same talking points that every other left turd spews, then you are a plagiarist!

  6. Exactly. I’m waiting for Dimwit Dog to come in with some idiotic argument.

    In short, I want ALL YOU LIBTARDS (ie Doggie) to march you precious little butts down to the Capitol and demand SSM to be on the ballot. Come on! Do it! I dare ya!

    Because they know, just as well as anyone, that it would fail. Which is why they are slithering like snakes to any judge that will listen to them to get this done through the courts. You can’t have it on the ballot because they know the result. Which really makes Doggie look like even more of an idiot. If that’s at all possible.

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