Joe Doakes from Como park emails:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
CEO: “Alright everybody, settle down. We’ve got a lot of ground to cover. First up, the White House proposes a tax on oil company profits as a way to stop . . . let me quote . . . “despicable price gouging and exploitation.” Any suggestions?”
VP Sales: “Sir, I don’t understand. How does raising taxes on our company help consumers at the pump?”
VP Diversity: “Higher taxes raise money to give to women, trans, and persons of color.”
VP Human Resources: “We could cut employees’ salaries, bring down our cost, reduce the price of gas at the pump?”
VP Finance: “Wouldn’t help. ‘Profits’ are what’s leftover after paying salaries, we’d still be taxed.”
VP Labor Relations: “The union wants wage increases. That would reduce our profits, right? Pay less taxes?”
VP Finance: “Yes, but profits are how we pay dividends to stockholders. Eliminate the profits and our stock price falls, including the value of all our stock options.”
-silence-
CEO: “We can’t cut costs, we can’t increase costs, we need a creative solution. Think people, think. Say, is there any more coffee? You there, I’m afraid I don’t know your name. More coffee?”
New Hire Secretary: “Yessir, right away. Um, sir?”
CEO: “Yes?”
New Hire Secretary: “Couldn’t you just pass along the new taxes to the customer? I mean, so the price of gas goes up, so what? What are people going to do, sell their cars and buy electric?”
CEO: “Meeting adjourned. You, miss, come with me. And bring that coffee, we have a lot to talk about.”
Joe Doakes
<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\nNot quite \u201cripped from the headlines \u201c. Or\u2026 Is it?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Joe Doakes from Como park emails: CEO: “Alright everybody, settle down. We’ve got a lot of ground to cover. First up, the White House proposes a tax on oil company profits as a way to stop . . . let me quote . . . “despicable price gouging and exploitation.” Any suggestions?” VP Sales: “Sir, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[57,123],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-81520","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-economy-and-the-market","category-taxes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81520","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=81520"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81520\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":81521,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81520\/revisions\/81521"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=81520"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=81520"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=81520"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}