{"id":49673,"date":"2014-12-10T07:00:07","date_gmt":"2014-12-10T13:00:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/?p=49673"},"modified":"2014-12-10T15:43:00","modified_gmt":"2014-12-10T21:43:00","slug":"if-i-were-the-dean-at-harvard-law-school","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/?p=49673","title":{"rendered":"If I Were The Dean At Harvard Law School"},"content":{"rendered":"

To: \u00a0Students of Harvard Law School
\nFrom: Mitch Berg, Angry Dean
\nRe: \u00a0Test Schedules<\/p>\n

Dear Most Annoying Students in the World,<\/p>\n

Starting at 8AM Monday morning, please line up in the front hall of the administration building in alphabetical order. \u00a0You will all be issued refund checks. \u00a0Because clearly we at HarvLaw have failed you as an institution.<\/p>\n

The evidence – you all know that term, right? – is right here<\/a>:<\/p>\n

Those Harvard students have produced an open letter, in which they demand that their examinations be delayed. \u201cLike many across the country,\u201d its authors claim, students \u201care traumatized\u201d and \u201cvisibly distressed\u201d \u2014 to the extent that there is now a \u201cpalpable anguish looming over campus.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I hope I’m long dead before I have people from big law firms writing me, chocking back their outrage at his institution for turning out such a vacuous pack of hamsters and calling them not only “lawyers”, but “Harvard Law School Grads”.<\/p>\n

The \u201cnational crisis\u201d that has been provoked by the cases of Garner and Brown, they argue, has left them with no choice but to \u201cstand for justice rather than sit and prepare for exams.\u201d And, like their brethren at Columbia, they contend that their \u201cbeing asked to prepare for and take our exams in this moment\u201d amounts to their \u201cbeing asked to perform incredible acts of disassociation\u201d \u2014 requests, which taken together, have led them \u201cto question our place in this school community and the legal community at large.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I can’t wait to see you vacuous children of boundless class privilege try that on a client in the real world; claim the violence inherent in the system makes it impossible for you to come into the office and work on your cases. \u00a0But at least you won’t “question your place in the legal community at large”, because by that point you’ll be transferring to the “fast food community”.<\/p>\n

Justifiably so.<\/p>\n

The bottom line? That students must be given \u201cthe opportunity to reschedule their exams in good faith and at their own discretion.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And in good faith, I, your dean, will allow you and your faith and discretion to move your exams to any time another law school will let you, provided you get admitted.<\/p>\n

Pick up your checks. \u00a0You haven’t failed. I have.<\/p>\n

That is all.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

To: \u00a0Students of Harvard Law School From: Mitch Berg, Angry Dean Re: \u00a0Test Schedules Dear Most Annoying Students in the World, Starting at 8AM Monday morning, please line up in the front hall of the administration building in alphabetical order. \u00a0You will all be issued refund checks. \u00a0Because clearly we at HarvLaw have failed you […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[24,308,309,44],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-49673","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-culture-war","category-entitled-america","category-indoctrinate-u","category-stupid"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49673","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=49673"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49673\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":49677,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49673\/revisions\/49677"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=49673"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=49673"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=49673"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}