{"id":44350,"date":"2014-05-28T12:00:32","date_gmt":"2014-05-28T17:00:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/?p=44350"},"modified":"2014-05-28T10:55:16","modified_gmt":"2014-05-28T15:55:16","slug":"americas-bargain","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/?p=44350","title":{"rendered":"America&#8217;s Bargain"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>SCENE: \u00a0As America decides its political course for the next few years, an omniscient narrator asks an illustrative, rhetorical question.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>THE OMNISCIENT NARRATOR: \u00a0 So, American electorate: \u00a0if you have a choice between being beaten to death, or living a normal life, which do you pick?<\/p>\n<p>THE AMERICAN ELECTORATE: \u00a0Those are the choices?<\/p>\n<p>THE OMNISCIENT NARRATOR: \u00a0Yep. \u00a0Beaten to death, or normal life.<\/p>\n<p>THE AMERICAN ELECTORATE: \u00a0And when you say &#8220;beaten to death&#8221;, you mean&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>THE OMNISCIENT NARRATOR: \u00a0&#8230;pummeled with baseball bats until you bleed to death from multiple blunt force injuries.<\/p>\n<p>THE AMERICAN ELECTORATE: \u00a0Huh. \u00a0Life, or getting beaten to death. Let me think.<\/p>\n<p>THE OMNISCIENT NARRATOR: \u00a0Take your time.<\/p>\n<p>THE AMERICAN ELECTORATE: Can we <a href=\"http:\/\/www.realclearpolitics.com\/articles\/2014\/05\/25\/voters_seek_middle_want_results_122745.html#ixzz32jjrmpTu\">settle on just getting pummeled until we get badly injured?<\/a><\/p>\n<p>(And SCENE)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>SCENE: \u00a0As America decides its political course for the next few years, an omniscient narrator asks an illustrative, rhetorical question. THE OMNISCIENT NARRATOR: \u00a0 So, American electorate: \u00a0if you have a choice between being beaten to death, or living a normal life, which do you pick? THE AMERICAN ELECTORATE: \u00a0Those are the choices? THE OMNISCIENT [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[121,187],"tags":[236],"class_list":["post-44350","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-campaign-14","category-campaign-16","tag-dramatization"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/44350","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=44350"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/44350\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":44378,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/44350\/revisions\/44378"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=44350"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=44350"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=44350"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}