(SCENE:\u00a0 In the rotunda of the New Jersey state capitol in Trenton, at\u00a0the swearing-in ceremony for Corey BOOKER, new junior Senator from Exit 18 on the Garden State Parkway.\u00a0 BOOKER is being sworn in by Governor Chris CHRISTIE, in a ceremony attended by a clot of various Jersey dignitaries).<\/p>\n
(Fade in on CHRISTIE administering the last part of the oath of office)<\/p>\n
BOOKER:\u00a0 “…to the best of my ability, so help me Sinatra”.\u00a0<\/p>\n
(Round of applause as BOOKER waves to the audience and CHRISTIE steps back to the dignitary seating.\u00a0 BOOKER steps to the mike).<\/p>\n
BOOKER:\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 (Applause dies down).\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 Thank you.<\/p>\n
(Audience trades glances as hall falls silent).<\/p>\n
BOOKER:\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 Thanks.\u00a0 Thanks.<\/p>\n
(Audience stirs)<\/p>\n
BOOKER:\u00a0 Thanks.\u00a0 First, I want to thank Governor Christie for giving me the most eloquent introduction since the one I gave at the funeral of my old friend, T-Bone the Crack Dealer.\u00a0 He became a close confidante after trying to kill me with a chain saw after he accused me of cheating at cards in a pick-up 3-card monte game at a casino at Atlantic City in between rounds of my World Series of Poker championship, where I was partying with Kim Kardashian and her father Robert, talking about the time I held a dying Nicole Simpson in my arms after she was shot by Biggie Smalls.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 T-Bone told me “You are without a doubt the most competent, sensitive, and yet totally boss brother in history”,\u00a0 just before I hit my four million dollar jackpot.\u00a0\u00a0 And then hit it with…Amy Adams.\u00a0 Yeah, that’s the ticket.\u00a0<\/p>\n
Not since I was governor of Philadelphia have I felt such a sense of profound calling…<\/p>\n
CHRISTIE:\u00a0 (Sotto voce<\/em>) Er, Senator?\u00a0 You were mayor.\u00a0 <\/em>Of Newark<\/em>.<\/p>\n BOOKER:\u00a0 Er…really?\u00a0 Newark?<\/p>\n CHRISTIE:\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0<\/p>\n BOOKER:\u00a0 Are you sure?<\/p>\n CHRISTIE:\u00a0 Yep.\u00a0<\/p>\n BOOKER:\u00a0 I need a second opinion. Mr. Springsteen?<\/p>\n SPRINGSTEEN: Yep.\u00a0 Newark.<\/p>\n BOOKER:\u00a0 You wrote “Rosalita” about me, didn’t you?<\/p>\n SPRINGSTEEN:\u00a0 (stares blankly, mouth moving, but no sound coming out)<\/p>\n BOOKER:\u00a0 And about that city with the giant Exxon sign?<\/p>\n SPRINGSTEEN:\u00a0 Er – that was “Jungleland”<\/p>\n BOOKER:\u00a0 You wrote “Jungleland” about me?\u00a0 And T-Bone?<\/p>\n CHRISTIE (Sotto Voce<\/em> to an aide) Maybe Booker was “Eddie” in “Meeting Across the River”<\/p>\n BOOKER:\u00a0 Anyway – not since I was archduke of Manhattan have I…<\/p>\n CHRISTIE (exasperated): Mayor of Newark!<\/em><\/p>\n <\/em>BOOKER (impatient):\u00a0 Are you sure<\/em>?\u00a0 Newark?\u00a0 Really?<\/p>\n CHRISTIE:\u00a0 Really!<\/p>\n BOOKER:\u00a0 What state is that in?<\/p>\n (And SCENE)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" (SCENE:\u00a0 In the rotunda of the New Jersey state capitol in Trenton, at\u00a0the swearing-in ceremony for Corey BOOKER, new junior Senator from Exit 18 on the Garden State Parkway.\u00a0 BOOKER is being sworn in by Governor Chris CHRISTIE, in a ceremony attended by a clot of various Jersey dignitaries). (Fade in on CHRISTIE administering the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[236],"class_list":["post-39080","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-democrats","tag-dramatization"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39080","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=39080"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39080\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":39098,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39080\/revisions\/39098"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=39080"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=39080"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=39080"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}