To: \u00a0Arby’s
\nFrom: Mitch Berg, very rare Arby’s eater
\nRe: \u00a0Bo Dietle<\/p>\n
Dear Arby’s:<\/p>\n
I applaud you for dropping “RB”, the annoying pseudo-hipster who spent the past two years warbling “It’s good mood food!” at the end of your commercials. \u00a0Paradoxically, he inevitably eroded my mood.<\/p>\n
But I have to ask: who green-lighted the current campaign, with “Bo Dietl”, the crusty “New York Detective” yammering about where the meat gets sliced? Trying to jam a meat slicer through a drive-through window?<\/p>\n
It’s fast food, people. We know it’s all replicated from genetically-modified generic protein product. \u00a0And the fewer fast food joints have slicers, the fewer fingertips I bite into.<\/p>\n
You’re not curing cancer, here. \u00a0Please see to this.<\/p>\n
That is all.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
To: \u00a0Arby’s From: Mitch Berg, very rare Arby’s eater Re: \u00a0Bo Dietle Dear Arby’s: I applaud you for dropping “RB”, the annoying pseudo-hipster who spent the past two years warbling “It’s good mood food!” at the end of your commercials. \u00a0Paradoxically, he inevitably eroded my mood. But I have to ask: who green-lighted the current […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-32350","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-geekery"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32350","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=32350"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32350\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32352,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32350\/revisions\/32352"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=32350"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=32350"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=32350"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}