{"id":13234,"date":"2010-09-05T16:29:42","date_gmt":"2010-09-05T21:29:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/?p=13234"},"modified":"2014-10-02T10:20:00","modified_gmt":"2014-10-02T15:20:00","slug":"my-conversation-with-every-single-dfler-part-ii","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/?p=13234","title":{"rendered":"My Conversation With Every Single DFLer, Part II"},"content":{"rendered":"

The conversation below is “Fake But Accurate”, and reflects things said – to me and otherwise – by DFLers in a variety of media over the past week or so. \u00a0I have synthethized those conversations into a single, “composite” character, whom I’ll nickname “EVERY DFLer” for clarity.<\/p>\n

Don’t try this if you’re not an English major.<\/p>\n

SCENE: \u00a0A coffee shop. \u00a0MITCH is sitting at table drinking black coffee. \u00a0EVERY DFLer walks by drinking an organic mo-chai-frapp-iato, recognizes MITCH.<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: (Hisses<\/em>).<\/p>\n

MITCH: \u00a0(Notices ED): \u00a0Hey, what’s up?<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0Tom Emmer doesn’t have a plan!<\/p>\n

MITCH: Of course he does. \u00a0He just hasn’t released it yet.<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: That means he has no plan! HAHAHAHA!<\/p>\n

MITCH: Well , no. \u00a0It means that he’s saving the plan for the campaign homestretch. \u00a0Because until sometime between Labor Day and Election Day, the only people who really care about politics, especially specifics of things like “plans”, are wonks, “journalists” and political junkies. \u00a0All releasing a plan right before people actually give a crap does is give the DFL time to frame it before any actual voters – including undecideds actually give a hoot.<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0Yabbut, Mark Dayton has a plan!<\/a><\/p>\n

MITCH: Right. \u00a0And it’s full of holes<\/a> and union swag and at the end of the day doesn’t even solve the problem it is putatively designed to deal with [Note: \u00a0the link goes to my “Dayton Dustbowl” category, which will be the subject of about ten posts on Tuesday – Ed<\/em>.]<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0But he has a plan<\/em>! \u00a0Emmer doesn’t!<\/p>\n

MITCH: \u00a0Oh, I think you can count on seeing a plan starting to come out any day now.<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: Yeah, but it’s not out now<\/em>! \u00a0It doesn’t count!<\/p>\n

MITCH: So when Emmer does come out with a plan, your entire attack falls flat…<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0No! \u00a0Because Emmer doens’t have a plan!<\/p>\n

MITCH: But when he <\/em>does come out with his plan…<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0Emmer doesn’t have a plan!<\/p>\n

MITCH: But when he <\/em>does come out<\/em> with his plan…<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0Emmer doesn’t have a plan!<\/p>\n

MITCH: But when he <\/em>does come out<\/em> with his plan…<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0Emmer doesn’t have a plan!<\/p>\n

MITCH: But when he <\/em>does <\/strong>come out with his plan<\/em>…<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0Emmer doesn’t have a plan!<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0Emmer doesn’t have a plan!<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0Emmer doesn’t have a plan!<\/p>\n

MITCH: OK, let’s try a different tack, here. Let’s say, hypothetically, that a candidate – let’s call him “Ron Bremmer” – comes out with a plan to cut spending and hold the line on taxes, maybe even cut ’em, while re-engineering government so that it doesn’t eat up every nickel in overtaxation with frivolous spending when the times are <\/em>good, like the DFL and the old, RINO MNGOP did from 1968 through 1992. \u00a0What then.<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: …<\/p>\n

MITCH: \u00a0Well?<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: …<\/p>\n

MITCH: It’s a hypothetical question.<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: …<\/p>\n

MITCH: \u00a0What would you do?<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0 Your a racist who hates immigrants and gay people!<\/p>\n

MITCH: No, I’m not.<\/p>\n

EVERY DFLer: \u00a0Target! \u00a0Trigg Trigg Trigg Trigg! \u00a0Best Buy! What about the children?!?!<\/em><\/p>\n

That pretty much covers it.<\/p>\n

UPDATE: \u00a0Schwoops – someday just came! \u00a0 Emmer is reportedly unveiling the first part of his plan later today.<\/p>\n

Stay tuned.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The conversation below is “Fake But Accurate”, and reflects things said – to me and otherwise – by DFLers in a variety of media over the past week or so. \u00a0I have synthethized those conversations into a single, “composite” character, whom I’ll nickname “EVERY DFLer” for clarity. Don’t try this if you’re not an English […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[60],"tags":[312],"class_list":["post-13234","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-campaign-10","tag-mngov-2010"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13234","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=13234"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13234\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":47696,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13234\/revisions\/47696"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=13234"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=13234"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shotinthedark.info\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=13234"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}